RJB

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RJB

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 34972
  • Number of comments : 274
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About RJB : Phuck Filly. Dallas sucks. Redskins always sucked. Suck on our three Lombardi Trophies Eagles, might as well have a taste considering you will never get one.

RJB's page activity

Visits<b>alexflan</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 5:06pm<b>spfitz</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:30am<b>DandoMclovin</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 6:41pm<b>MdMan3</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 9:13am<b>winchester97</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 9:11pm<b>SuperDani</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 6:52pm<b>OPlonker</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 11:38am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 4:27pm<b>dockate95</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:05am<b>Phazoid</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 1:18am<b>papasmurf3551</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 7:38am<b>girlz123</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 5:25pm<b>ad1836</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:40am<b>17carusoe</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 8:42pm<b>iman97</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 12:29am<b>KennethHuynh</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 10:32pm<b>ditchedbymom</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:09am<b>duduv2</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 10:41am

Fucked!<b>MdMan3</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 3:13pm<b>watson1234</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:25pm

RJB's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

RJB's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2009 at 3:06am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I suffered a mental breakdown. I told my roommates about it, and they decided to throw a very loud party while I was sobbing in my room, unable to sleep. My Xanax prescription ran out, I have no more sick days, and I have to wake up in two hours to work a ten hour day. FML

by sadparty / 11/06/2009 at 1:05am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, while working on my girlfriend of three years' computer I found a file called 'My future wedding'. I assumed it was very old and decided to look through it. Of the list of 5 potential grooms I was not one of them. This didn't bother me until I saw that it had last been edited two days ago. FML

by Rage / 10/08/2009 at 1:31pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML

by Dude / 08/19/2009 at 6:32am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my brother clean his room. While putting clothes away, I found a box of thongs. They were mine. FML

by haha247 / 08/14/2009 at 10:09am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML

by fazzems / 08/06/2009 at 11:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got engaged to my boyfriend of three years. I made the announcement on my status on facebook so people would congratulate me. The only response I got about my engagement was from a girl I knew saying; "Umm, he didn't tell you he was cheating on you for three years with me?" FML

by ididntdoanythingaight / 08/02/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I found out that my brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of Warcraft money. FML

by Anon / 07/27/2009 at 3:32am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, my little brother texted me informing me that our father has "become a nudist" since returning home from a month-long trip abroad. I thought he was joking or exaggerating, but when I went over to say hi, the first thing I saw upon walking through the door was my dad's droopy ball sac. FML

by mubaki / 07/24/2009 at 1:07pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML

by picturemenakedbaby / 07/21/2009 at 6:42am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

by Anonymous / 07/21/2009 at 2:06am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were chatting on MSN. He had to go run down to the corner market but left his webcam on. Shortly after he left I watched his mother steal 60 dollars out of his wallet. He doesn't believe me. FML

by wtf / 07/15/2009 at 1:04am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I took a bike ride to enjoy the weather and stopped for a break on the sidewalk of an overpass, taking in the view of the beautiful hills. I was approached by a cop, who said to me: "Ma'am, I know your life is crap right now, but I'm sure it'll get better. Please don't jump." FML

by Liz / 07/01/2009 at 1:41pm / United States (New York) / Transportation