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Quimpo

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Quimpo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 August 1988 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1617
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Quimpo : I'm on a lot when I'm bored at work. I do my best to cheer up as much people as I can cause I'm corny like that!

Quimpo's page activity

Visits<b>Monster27</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 6:14pm<b>mkm2s</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 6:46pm<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 11:34pm<b>ribbons</b> - the 12/04/2012 at 6:08am<b>Donnakar</b> - the 10/06/2012 at 4:45pm

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Quimpo's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking with my boyfriend when a guy walked up to me and told me I look exactly like Taylor Swift. My boyfriend punched him in the face and told him that Taylor Swift is a lot more attractive. I'm actually considering leaving him for the complete stranger. FML

#20130143
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30162) - you deserved it (2626)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by jeanrose2013 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML

#20130128
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21724) - you deserved it (4259)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by Pokemon problems - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

#20129928
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30614) - you deserved it (9995)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States

Today, my fiancé's stepfather asked me how my teaching job was going. I replied heatedly that I've never taught, and then complained bitterly to my fiancé about how his family still doesn't know me. Turns out his stepfather has early onset dementia, and that I'm an asshole. FML

#20129656
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8271) - you deserved it (30318)

On 10/23/2012 at 9:29am - misc - by inthefamily (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I had a job interview for a job I've been dying to have. As I'm walking into the office, the manager says, "Aren't you my son's ex, the one he cheated on?" All I could do was sit there quietly as he laughed at me. FML

#20129479
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26857) - you deserved it (2029)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:54am - work - by emilyparra1 - United States (Florida)

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

#20129296
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9608) - you deserved it (51761)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26214) - you deserved it (4787)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29575) - you deserved it (4510)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML

#20127982
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22791) - you deserved it (1502)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML

#20127937
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22582) - you deserved it (1532)

On 10/22/2012 at 5:01am - love - by reserved - United States (California)

Today, on the first cold night of autumn, I realized I need a girlfriend because the only way I can stay warm is if I spoon with my dog. FML

#20127903
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16536) - you deserved it (4383)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by sadguyme (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML

#20127779
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24116) - you deserved it (3385)

On 10/22/2012 at 1:29am - love - by sausagefingers (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

#20127667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28503) - you deserved it (1493)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:07am - work - by Lunazel93 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML

#20127252
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5866) - you deserved it (50790)

On 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)



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