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Quimpo

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Quimpo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 August 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1927
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Quimpo : I'm on a lot when I'm bored at work. I do my best to cheer up as much people as I can cause I'm corny like that!

Quimpo's page activity

Visits<b>Monster27</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 6:14pm<b>mkm2s</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 6:46pm<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 11:34pm<b>ribbons</b> - the 12/04/2012 at 6:08am<b>Donnakar</b> - the 10/06/2012 at 4:45pm

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Quimpo's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. I thought it was all going really well, until I looked up a minute or two in, only to be greeted by a stone-cold death glare and the words, "You really are an idiot, aren't you?" FML

#20144510
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (7453)

On 11/02/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML

#20143987
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21344) - you deserved it (2285)

On 11/02/2012 at 1:53am - work - by whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

#20142866
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23495) - you deserved it (4215) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML

#20142562
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27108) - you deserved it (4523)

On 11/01/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by NoSpirit (woman) -

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30620) - you deserved it (6491)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my over-controlling parents would be moving in next door. I'm almost 23, and moved 5,365 KM away to get away from them. FML

#20142163
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26296) - you deserved it (1538)

On 10/31/2012 at 9:39pm - misc - by OhLovely (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

#20141794
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24352) - you deserved it (3509)

On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26236) - you deserved it (1852)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

#20141262
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24500) - you deserved it (3005)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30887) - you deserved it (3431)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML

#20141147
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21343) - you deserved it (2629)

On 10/31/2012 at 12:22am - love - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25188) - you deserved it (1935)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML

#20140430
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26499) - you deserved it (2536)

On 10/30/2012 at 5:26pm - misc - by rarara - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, she asked me to whisper her name. Apparently, her name is not Kate. FML

#20140315
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10355) - you deserved it (70113)

On 10/30/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by you (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

#20140254
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25785) - you deserved it (3717)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States



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