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Offline (the 03/29/2015 at 7:19am) | Search for a member
About QQMorePlox : Im Victoria, am open to most things and can be incredibly friendly. I tend to be sarcastic a lot of the time and can come off as an asshole but I assure you it's in good humour. So yeah, if you feel chatty send me something hilarious and I'll be sure to reply (: best way to kick off a conversation is with a terrible pick up line or incredibly funny joke
And If you had healys as a child, you are most definitely my hero
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML
Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to spurt my man-mush into an old gym sock, and had picked up some concentrated bronzer. I now have neon-orange hands and genitals. FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML
Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML
Friday 27 March 2015