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PyroTim

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PyroTim

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1383
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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PyroTim's page activity

Visits<b>ThatsStoryOfLife</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:01pm<b>julako</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 6:24pm<b>drivingmissdaisy</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:33pm<b>Unkreative</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 6:49am<b>RockNRollAndrew</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:18pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 11:55am<b>XxOtakuDemonxX</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 1:58am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 5:11pm<b>Meanmommy02</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 11:10am<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 1:59pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 10:02pm<b>head2133</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 10:55pm<b>DevinEleven</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:09pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 8:33am<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 9:51pm<b>nicolemadden</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:28pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 10:30am<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 6:45pm

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PyroTim's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, a customer at work pronounced the word "Asian" as "Ah-See-Awn" when ordering a salad. I wasn't allowed to say anything. FML

#21065187
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34504) - you deserved it (3837)

On 02/19/2014 at 1:24am - work - by PaneraSucks - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

#21061692
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52106) - you deserved it (7819)

On 02/15/2014 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31495) - you deserved it (47579)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46934) - you deserved it (4002)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

#21031072
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40486) - you deserved it (5624)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:28pm - health - by SqueakingRetard (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML

#21026318
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21767) - you deserved it (48456)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55959) - you deserved it (5626)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

#21024175
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45688) - you deserved it (5162)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:55am - love - by rollergirl13 - United States (Alaska)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46213) - you deserved it (8702)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

#21019082
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48704) - you deserved it (20204)

On 01/06/2014 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I found out that I am bleeding from my cervix and must refrain from having sex for the next two weeks. My fiancé pointedly asked if my cervix has anything to do with my mouth. FML

#20987856
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49954) - you deserved it (9728)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66590) - you deserved it (5554)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)

Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML

#20969207
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43247) - you deserved it (3371)

On 11/24/2013 at 4:38pm - work - by fuggers :/ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59420) - you deserved it (4294)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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