About PyroCaptain : United States Marine. You should be honored to be on my profile.
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PyroCaptain's favorite FMLs
Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML
by mariokarter / 08/28/2009 at 12:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation
Today, I was eating lunch naked at my home watching porn on the big screen. I heard the garage door opening meaning my roommate was coming home. In my haste to get dressed, I fell back in the barstool I was sitting in and knocked myself out. I woke up still naked and with lettuce all over me. FML
by HansonLUVR / 03/11/2009 at 8:26pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
- Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife… Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and refused to give me back the condoms I'd just bought. Why?… Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen,…