About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.
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PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs
Today, while on the skytrain, a woman leaned on the railing bar that I was holding onto, crushing my hand. My first instinct was to move my hand when she turned around and began loudly yelling at me for, "Touching her waist" and "Sexually harassing" her. FML
by Whyudodis / 10/01/2016 at 3:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation
by RjsBabe / 10/01/2016 at 2:14am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by dukemisery / 10/01/2016 at 1:34am / Hong Kong / Animals
by DezyCoCo / 10/01/2016 at 1:14am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, I found out my brand new $3,000 mattress that is supposed to relieve my back pain works amazingly. I only discovered this because my wife, son, daughter, dog, and two cats are all asleep on it and not waking up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I placed sticky mouse traps in my bedroom. it's now 12:05 a.m. and I've successfully caught a mouse. Too bad I'm scared of them and my husband is passed out asleep. I now get to listen to a mouse squeak all night and have to be up in 4 hours. FML.
by MouseLover.. / 09/30/2016 at 12:06am / United States / Animals
by DreeStahr / 09/30/2016 at 12:05am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, I found out my father has been saving money to help me buy my first car. In the same conversation, I found out my mother, unbeknownst to my dad, used nearly all of the money to bail my drunken, deadbeat uncle out of jail for the 4th time a month ago. He is now back in prison. FML
by fox_at_heart / 09/29/2016 at 10:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
Today, I spent about 45 minutes attaching brackets and weatherproof lights to the umbrella in my patio set. It looked great, and I was excited to finally sit out under them at night - until the umbrella shifted and fell over, shattering the glass table top. FML
by baldiesmom / 09/29/2016 at 3:07pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Lamediseased / 09/29/2016 at 11:07am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Health
by mavrick127 / 09/29/2016 at 10:21am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I was travelling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
by sufia / 09/29/2016 at 7:14am / Pakistan / Transportation
Today, I was excited to finally get an interview after being unemployed since getting out of the military nearly a year ago. Turns out, they weren't even interested in hiring me. They'd just never met a female Marine before. FML
by Female / 09/28/2016 at 11:26pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years in front of the sell-out crowd at the baseball game, but at the security checkpoint, the security guard made me take the ring out and open it after I walked through the metal detector. No need to say it, worst proposal ever. FML
by Malcolm654 / 09/28/2016 at 11:20pm / United States (California) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…