Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

PrimeStarscream

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

PrimeStarscream

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 January 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 57725
  • Number of comments : 258
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.

PrimeStarscream's page activity

Visits<b>musifer</b> - yesterday at 3:23am<b>zaidthunder1</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 1:09am<b>TrapTheKing</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:45pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 7:36pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:29pm<b>HindiCraft</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 11:25pm<b>prettypanic</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:31pm<b>xdafuze</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:45am<b>saffy66</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 9:56am<b>teentee401</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 8:44am<b>seninaa</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:59am<b>justinkoch</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:19pm<b>marcusterry</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 5:34am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 2:09pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 12:34pm<b>NDForever1</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 4:49pm<b>izkiz</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 4:03pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:43am

PrimeStarscream's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

See all of PrimeStarscream's badges

PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

#21458879
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20907) - you deserved it (5612)

On 08/21/2015 at 2:22pm - health - by fuck (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after months of taking care of my grandma after a surgery, the doctors gave her a clean bill of health and I finally got to sleep in my own bed. She passed away while I was at home. FML

#21458841
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33532) - you deserved it (1555)

On 08/21/2015 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23792) - you deserved it (6115)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, I was putting the cat outside. He wouldn't go, so I kicked him. Then I woke up to my husband screaming. I’d been dreaming, and the "cat" I kicked was his family jewels. FML

#21458762
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21935) - you deserved it (7956)

On 08/21/2015 at 4:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, one of my ears randomly went deaf. I went to the doctor, thinking I had an ear infection or something. Turns out that your ears can go deaf entirely without reason, and I now have medication to take to see if I can get any of my hearing back in that ear. I'm only 26. FML

#21458738
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26925) - you deserved it (1391)

On 08/21/2015 at 2:22am - health - by ANON - United States (California)

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo, because she loves tigers. Correction: she used to love tigers, until one sprayed urine on her from a distance of four meters. FML

#21458732
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21376) - you deserved it (5043)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I turned in an essay about a book I'd read over the summer. My teacher later called me to her desk and began to gush about how interesting the book sounded and asked to borrow my copy. The book I wrote about is not real, and the main characters are named after my childhood pets. FML

#21458720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20539) - you deserved it (14478)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by technicallywroteabook (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by offering me a foot massage to ease my sore feet after a run. I asked for a lot of pressure. Now I'm back home in a walking boot after being diagnosed with a fractured fifth metatarsal bone. FML

#21458628
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20942) - you deserved it (4809)

On 08/20/2015 at 9:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while I was taking a long relaxing shower, the shower head decided to fly off and hit me in the face. The dentist couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21458540
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18965) - you deserved it (4743)

On 08/20/2015 at 5:24pm - misc - by sstahpp (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my boss bitched me out for violating workplace privacy, after he found an FML post from last year that eerily resembled a situation that happened the same year. He thought I posted it and twisted things to make him look like an idiot. I've never posted here in my life. FML

#21458477
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25235) - you deserved it (2317)

On 08/20/2015 at 1:48pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML

#21458464
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21431) - you deserved it (2422)

On 08/20/2015 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally dropped and shattered my small bathroom mirror. My sister came to see what was going on, took one look at the shattered mirror, and said, "About time you put it out if its misery." FML

#21458446
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (2424)

On 08/20/2015 at 12:18pm - misc - by fuck you btichass cuntshit (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was talking to a colleague about love. He told me he's given up on love because things ended badly with a previous girl. I said, "Maybe it wasn't meant to be, and she wasn't the one." He then said the reason it didn't work out was because she killed herself. FML

#21458398
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23811) - you deserved it (3611)

On 08/20/2015 at 8:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, after working incredibly hard to get into college without having to take out loans, classes started. I was told we'll need a $200 piece of software, and we'll fail without it. There's no way I can afford it. FML

#21458353
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24219) - you deserved it (1927)

On 08/20/2015 at 3:21am - misc - by NotCollegeBound (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML

#21458335
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21657) - you deserved it (2171)

On 08/20/2015 at 2:02am - love - by Catsfordays - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: