Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

PrimeStarscream

Offline (yesterday at 8:08am) | Search for a member

PrimeStarscream

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 January 1980 (34 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 33085
  • Number of comments : 246
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.

PrimeStarscream's page activity

Visits<b>facelick</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:43pm<b>bmmondi95</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:15pm<b>tonjuu</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:47pm<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 8:02am<b>RhineBl</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 9:35pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 11:32am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 3:57pm<b>imyy</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 11:49pm<b>marleeehpark</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:29am<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 12:58am<b>Skyzeri</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 12:19pm<b>hotbutthurttoast</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 11:35pm<b>cluch3</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:06pm<b>IDunnoTellMe</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 3:23pm<b>crooklynkid</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:25pm<b>steeeeee</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 2:44pm<b>jureuter</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 8:44pm<b>maripili_IN</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 10:40pm

PrimeStarscream's FML badges

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of PrimeStarscream's badges

PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs

Today, I got called to the guidance office, only to be told my boyfriend broke up with me. He wasn't sure how to break the news to me, so he made my guidance counselor do it for him. FML

#21277708
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40855) - you deserved it (2928)

On 10/14/2014 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, an elderly woman was crossing the street and dropped her bag of groceries. I got out of my car to assist her, but she beat me repeatedly, yelling that I was "enforcing a stereotype". Sorry for trying to help. FML

#21277469
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32994) - you deserved it (2708)

On 10/14/2014 at 3:15am - misc - by I_AM_READING - United States (Alaska)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32308) - you deserved it (4423)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42941) - you deserved it (2948)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML

#21276883
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35756) - you deserved it (4037)

On 10/13/2014 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my wife pressed a button in the elevator and quickly ran out, leaving me in there with my crying baby. When the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors opened on a wedding reception. The doors couldn't have taken any longer to close again FML

#21276854
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34403) - you deserved it (3200)

On 10/13/2014 at 11:42am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

#21276832
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35488) - you deserved it (7077)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - intimacy - by badplacerightnow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31957) - you deserved it (4479)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30737) - you deserved it (3166)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33868) - you deserved it (3219)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML

#21276337
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34024) - you deserved it (4912)

On 10/12/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my morning sickness got so bad that, while at the grocery store, I had to throw up in my purse. FML

#21276226
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (3521)

On 10/12/2014 at 1:38pm - misc - by Mc2013 (woman) - United States

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML

#21276185
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31593) - you deserved it (3342)

On 10/12/2014 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by KO - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: