About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.
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PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs
Today, I got my new smartwatch that I ordered for myself on the promise that I would use it for tracking my new exercise routine. Instead, I used it for playing Pong whilst eating cake and drinking wine. FML
by TomorrowMaybe / 10/08/2016 at 12:29pm / Denmark (Sjelland) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/08/2016 at 9:20am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by spider-sarah / 10/08/2016 at 5:35am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
by makayta / 10/08/2016 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Work
by mikki_arlert / 10/08/2016 at 1:24am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
by hopeless / 10/07/2016 at 4:28pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, the cat climbed up to the spice shelf while I was cooking. As I looked up and told him to leave, he tipped over a chili container which coated my face with chili powder. The bloody pain in my eyes then made me knock over a pot of boiling water. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2016 at 4:22pm / Switzerland / Animals
Today, I got my employee review. They thanked me for taking on so much extra work, which helps keep us on schedule. Then they said that I was focusing too much on work that other people should be doing. We need 12 people to fully staff our store for a day, and we have less than that actually working here. FML
by SadRetailWorker / 10/07/2016 at 4:08pm / United States / Work
Today my daughter asked me to do her a huge favor : undergo a liposuction transplantation where my fat would be sucked out then put into her butt and thighs. Apparently, I am the fattest DNA match to her, lessening the risk of her rejecting the transplant. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2016 at 12:37pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health
Today, my husband brought me breakfast in bed. Don't get me wrong, I'm very thankful and love him even more for the thought. But the only problem with breakfast in bed is that you have to eat what they bring you, even if it's bad. FML
by B.B / 10/07/2016 at 10:03am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, in an effort to be more active, I jumped out of bed ready for a morning jog. Or, that was the plan. Instead, I twisted my knee so badly standing up, it's now locked, and I can't move it. So much for activity. FML
by Ouchie / 10/07/2016 at 8:51am / Ireland (Kildare) / Health
by JEHR / 10/07/2016 at 3:21am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids
by Ican'tgotoschoolapparently / 10/07/2016 at 3:18am / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, I was house-hunting online. I was becoming increasingly discouraged and began to look for mini-houses in absurd desperation. I noticed the Google sidebar advertising a cute mini house within my budget. Excited, I clicked on the ad - only to discover it was an ad for a child's playhouse. FML
by Nohouseforme / 10/07/2016 at 1:38am / United States (Arizona) / Money
Today, I told my boyfriend the exact moment I fell in love with him: when we made eye contact in a crowd on our fifth date. He asked if I wanted to know what he was thinking at that moment. I then found out it was, "I really hope she can't smell that fart." FML
by saashtow / 10/07/2016 at 1:00am / United States (Georgia) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…