About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.
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PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs
Today, while at a baseball game, I was telling my friends about my underaged drinking experience at my sister's bachelorette party. It wasn't until I was done telling the story that I realized the Dean of my college was right behind us, looking right at me. So much for a good first impression. FML
by fuckingcool / 08/18/2016 at 5:19pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by sangoskywalker / 08/18/2016 at 5:12pm / Work
Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML
by Anonymous / 08/18/2016 at 4:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work
Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML
by LoveStinks / 08/18/2016 at 6:56am / Love
by LifeAndLemons95 / 08/18/2016 at 4:23am / Denmark / Miscellaneous
Today, I almost got our office burned down by plugging the wrong charger into a laptop cooling fan. Tried to hide the incident and kept it casual but the smoke detector led it to my area and everyone knew I was the culprit. I'm a new hire too. FML
by funfettifirework / 08/18/2016 at 1:08am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Work
by notthesame / 08/18/2016 at 12:45am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Tired / 08/17/2016 at 1:51pm / Work
by funnyhowthatwork / 08/17/2016 at 1:19pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML
by Anonymous / 08/17/2016 at 11:18am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spent nearly seven hours clearing out our storage room in order to transform it into my art studio. Things were going great until I tweaked my back. At least from my stationary position in bed I have a perfect view of the table I can't work at for the next 2 to 4 weeks. FML
by ArtistBlock / 08/17/2016 at 3:54am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by FriendlessLoser / 08/17/2016 at 3:11am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML
by Noah / 08/16/2016 at 2:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, my boyfriend came home from a trip early without telling me. When I got to his house and saw his car there, I texted him and said, "Oh you asshole". About five minutes later, I got a text from my boss asking if that text was for him. FML
by DuckyDew / 08/16/2016 at 1:51pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/16/2016 at 1:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous