PrimeStarscream

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Offline (the 05/28/2016 at 7:04am)

PrimeStarscream

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 January 1980 (36 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 67696
  • Number of comments : 259
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About PrimeStarscream : Megatron can go leap off a bridge.

PrimeStarscream's page activity

Visits<b>mercedesm</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:29pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 9:15pm<b>Itineranthuman</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 11:24pm<b>demix</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:50am<b>hoosiergirl94</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:16am<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 7:02pm<b>thecakeisalie13</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 7:06am<b>courtzzz23</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 10:45pm<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 1:57am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:40pm<b>willou35</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:04pm<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 9:11am<b>1penguin</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 10:42pm<b>celebi82</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:59pm<b>TheYoshiMan</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:14am<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 2:57am<b>turtlesokay</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 11:14pm<b>kadekerr</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 5:10pm

Fucked!<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 1:02am<b>epicx22</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 3:00am

PrimeStarscream's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of PrimeStarscream's badges

PrimeStarscream's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor kindly set off a bed bug fogger rather than getting an exterminator, which we'd even offered to help him pay for. We have baseboard heating in our condo building. Guess where the parasites crawled to now. FML

by UniverseHatesMe / 05/26/2016 at 6:04am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, the first thing I noticed about my blind date was the clump of nose hairs sticking out and mingling with his beard. In an effort to not stare, I periodically glanced away. After a while, he asked which guy I was into at the table next to us, because I was spending so much time looking in that direction. FML

by anonymous / 05/25/2016 at 11:45pm / United States (Idaho) / Love

Today, I went into my kitchen after placing a line of salt across the floor in front of the back door the night before to ward off slugs that keep getting in, only to find 12 idiotic slugs dead and shrivelled up, leaving a horrible gooey mess. I don't know why I expected any intelligence from them. FML

by Spongebob Garypants / 05/25/2016 at 10:05pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Animals

Today, I had a guest at my house. I stood up to shake her hand and kiss her on both cheeks, which is common in my culture. When she was kissing my cheeks, I went the opposite way from her and I ended up kissing her on the lips instead. Her eyes went big and I ran away. FML

by lmaofuck / 05/25/2016 at 9:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a trampoline park and jumped into an adult-area foam pit that apparently used to be for children. I guess it never occurred to them to change the depth of it, as I now have a fractured ankle. FML

by anonymous / 05/25/2016 at 8:34pm / United States (New Mexico) / Health

Today, I was taking a shower, facing away from the faucet, when I dropped the soap. When I bent over to pick up the soap, my sister flushed a toilet in the next room, causing hot water to scorch my anus. I got made my shower's bitch, FML

by teflon_hammer / 05/25/2016 at 7:19pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I'm on crutches due to hip surgery. I went to the fridge to grab a bite to eat, but quickly realized if I wanted anything, I would have to eat there. I can't carry anything. Cold leftovers here we go. FML

by Tmth / 05/25/2016 at 6:24pm / Health

Today, I felt an itch on my neck. naturally, I scratched it. After about 5 minutes of scratching, I realized that I've been scratching a dead fly on the back of my neck. FML

by Hamden824 / 05/25/2016 at 4:04pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally got my screaming, teething, 1-year-old daughter down for a nap to hopefully get some work done. The second I opened my laptop, FedEx dropped off a package and rang the doorbell. My dog went nuts. Then my neighbor rang the doorbell to let me know I had a package. My daughter's awake now. FML

by ryzzostar / 05/25/2016 at 3:50pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I left for work at 7:00 am, my dad was playing Grand Theft Auto 5. When I got home at 3:30, he was still playing. I'm 18 years old. He's 45. FML

Today, as always, I'd be so incredibly happy if my girlfriend loved me even half as much as she loves her cat. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2016 at 1:39pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, a stranger nearly beat the crap out of my boyfriend for being a pedo. I ended up showing the guy my driving license to prove I'm not a pre-teen and that I'm just freakishly young looking. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2016 at 12:38pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML

by longest minute / 05/25/2016 at 7:28am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I babysat my neighbor's twin 4-year-old girls again. When I took them out for lunch, they apparently had been addressing themselves as "my bitches", taught to them by their devil spawn 13-year-old brother. Everyone, including Chuck E. Cheese himself, was not pleased. FML

by Ban Hammered / 05/25/2016 at 6:35am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML

by mumblingdope / 05/25/2016 at 4:52am / Indonesia (Jakarta Raya) / Miscellaneous