About PokeMyZelda : Don't mind me, I'm just sitting here reading about everyone else's lives.
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PokeMyZelda's favorite FMLs
by mustabeendrugs / 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML
by HSampsON / 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm / Niger (Niamey) / Miscellaneous
by Cereal_mistress / 10/07/2013 at 2:54pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML
by -____- / 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by -___- / 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML
by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/26/2013 at 12:19pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/25/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML
by scared shitless in ohio / 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by chinaski7628 / 09/24/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (California) / Work
by cuntsmom / 09/24/2013 at 12:47am / United States / Kids
by friend loves a gay guy... / 09/23/2013 at 4:49pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/23/2013 at 2:15am / United States (California) / Work
by soannoyed / 09/22/2013 at 5:21pm / United States / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today my mom, bored lover of games and mysteries, bragged about outsmarting scammers by burning all…