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Plastinate

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 450
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 3:55pm<b>decimater</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 4:32pm<b>greendalehumans</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:39pm<b>LadyDerps</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 8:45pm<b>PikidiliJo</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 2:56pm<b>123765</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 7:53pm<b>Swandive235</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 12:59am<b>eaglerob</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 9:59am<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 7:01pm<b>Pandaburr1</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 3:15am

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Plastinate's favorite FMLs

Today, I clogged the toilet in the one-man bathroom at the corner store, with a line of about 5 people waiting outside. FML

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

#21397916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29780) - you deserved it (2105)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:44am - work - by cock blocked (man) - United States (California)

Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then heading back to his place and hooked up. Afterwards, I used the bathroom, and when I came out, he was going through his wallet and asked me how much he owed me. FML

#21391926
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31994) - you deserved it (9599)

On 04/11/2015 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

#21391420
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26825) - you deserved it (2869)

On 04/10/2015 at 6:17pm - misc - by dickhead (woman) - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a poop and as I started unrolling the toilet paper, the whole roll fell off the handle and rolled out underneath the cubicle door. I heard somebody laugh at me. Nobody helped. FML

#21383475
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28103) - you deserved it (2320)

On 03/29/2015 at 8:49am - misc - by ToiletRoll - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36786) - you deserved it (5104)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML

#21347765
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25999) - you deserved it (2419)

On 02/01/2015 at 1:13pm - health - by Why's it so cold in here? - United States

Today, I was stuck in the elevator at my building, so I pushed the emergency button which made a ringing noise. After half an hour, I hear someone yelling to the elevator, "Could you stop pushing that button, there are kids sleeping." FML

#21289322
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33204) - you deserved it (2370)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by Virginy - France

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", honey. FML

#21253313
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40662) - you deserved it (3868)

On 09/06/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by healthfreak - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

#21028790
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42868) - you deserved it (5661)

On 01/15/2014 at 2:22pm - misc - by coop42 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

#20952633
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37040) - you deserved it (3391)

On 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by fuck you, bitchcake (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special type of bubble wrap that cannot be popped. FML

#20924315
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48120) - you deserved it (4359)

On 10/17/2013 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

#20632729
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59096) - you deserved it (15511)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States



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