[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

Phil_McCracken

Search for a member

Phil_McCracken
  • Town/Country : Bowling Green, US
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 December 1984 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 852
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Phil_McCracken's last visitors

kayla_f_babyyy

Phil_McCracken's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Phil_McCracken's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend tried to serenade me with The Sex is Good by Saving Abel. According to him, "I have to fake it, I'd leave if I could. I'm not in love, but the sex is good." FML

#14521815 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (16080) - you deserved it (2380)

On 01/09/2011 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

#13823528 (239)

I agree, your life sucks (42780) - you deserved it (5966)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML

#13788956 (215)

I agree, your life sucks (4994) - you deserved it (31965)

On 11/10/2010 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

#13661699 (403)

I agree, your life sucks (48538) - you deserved it (6285)

On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324 (342)

I agree, your life sucks (26945) - you deserved it (15285)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, I spent the entire day at school being called Meg. My name isn't Meg, so I started to get really annoyed and confused. Later, I found out it was because I look like Meg from the show Family Guy. She's known for being unpopular, unwanted, ugly, and stupid. FML

#13145609 (405)

I agree, your life sucks (25174) - you deserved it (4075)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

#12837026 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (29160) - you deserved it (5488)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495 (282)

I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (8885)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML

#12284629 (401)

I agree, your life sucks (56804) - you deserved it (2727)

On 08/03/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Broken (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

#12082068 (348)

I agree, your life sucks (12500) - you deserved it (49184)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730 (331)

I agree, your life sucks (19317) - you deserved it (35296)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

#9180721 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (7234) - you deserved it (28021)

On 03/18/2010 at 4:21am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I applied for my job, while working at my job. I hope they hire me. FML

#9171908 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (14420) - you deserved it (3794)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:12pm - work - by TheSuregeon (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he could tell my head was "really in the game" and felt a stronger connection with me now and was glad I opened up and "let go" with him. FML

#9157788 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (6248) - you deserved it (22655)

On 03/17/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by shouldabeenapornstar (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I rear-ended a car while I was texting about the accident ahead which was causing all the traffic. FML

#9155456 (276)

I agree, your life sucks (3957) - you deserved it (57617)

On 03/17/2010 at 7:51am - misc - by KobraKommander - Sent from mobile version