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About PhantomRegiment7 : Hello! My name is Arely Fonseca and I am a pretty well up person! I love to talk, read, draw, play my trumpet, and march in my marching band. I'm currently in High School, and it's interesting lol. Uh, im a metal head, and pretty much I like all music except for new country, rap, rnb, hip hop, bubblegum pop, and any artist that came out of American Idol. :D if you wanna talk just message me, I don't mind at all! Later!! :3
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Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26832) - you deserved it (1864)
On 07/30/2011 at 1:15am - kids - by NaomiMadison - United States
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30341) - you deserved it (7316)
On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28797) - you deserved it (6873)
On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (4512)
On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23171) - you deserved it (10990)
On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12 year old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27157) - you deserved it (3824)
On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29833) - you deserved it (2320)
On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13545) - you deserved it (23582)
On 07/17/2011 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by CaoiiBieber - Ireland
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18944) - you deserved it (13586)
On 07/17/2011 at 4:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (27263) - you deserved it (5588)
On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)
Today, after working all day and putting in hours of overtime, I realized I never clocked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25539) - you deserved it (11506)
On 07/16/2011 at 3:19pm - work - by Brian - United States
Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset so I politely asked where is bathroom was so I could "powder my nose". After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28360) - you deserved it (2964)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27444) - you deserved it (4003)
Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21012) - you deserved it (61050)
On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39548) - you deserved it (10020)
On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
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