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PenguinBitch

55Fucked!

PenguinBitchPenguinBitch
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12813
  • Number of comments : 1086
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About PenguinBitch : Welcome! I have not been expecting you. Come back again tomorrow? Bring Guac.

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>BIGGItheTexan</b> - 8 hours ago<b>brutally</b> - 11 hours ago<b>wheresmymary</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Raleaf</b> - 15 hours ago<b>RedPillSucks</b> - 15 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - 15 hours ago<b>HumanitysFinest</b> - yesterday at 1:15pm<b>lucythomson</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:05pm<b>addisonrose12</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:22am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:55am<b>CultureChic</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:19am<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 11:41pm<b>leogachi</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:14pm<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 7:01pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:11pm<b>patrickbeast3ga</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 5:10pm<b>babe7260</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:52am<b>firelegend</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:05pm

Fucked!<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:41am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:01am<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:08pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:17am<b>MaltWarrior</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:47am<b>Drarry</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:17am<b>LoveNnyl</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 3:25am<b>allykaymorris</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 2:06am<b>skye147</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 12:03am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 12:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:43pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 9:53pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 7:32am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:44am<b>MehNameIsJuan</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 4:58pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:14am<b>ollis</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:03am

PenguinBitch's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

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Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought I'd finally make a step towards getting over my ex-fiancé by flirting with a cute waiter. I left him a note on the bill. He comes back, says "which one of you is [name]?" and leans down close to me to say, "Thanks for your note, but your card was declined." FML

#2203706
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46911) - you deserved it (7353)

On 05/23/2009 at 2:43am - love - by Mel (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a job interview at a local business with the owner who was man, and the manager who was a woman. I thought I did pretty well because I heard the manager whisper so, as I was walking out. Then I heard the owner whisper "no fat chicks." FML

#1958441
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39405) - you deserved it (6250)

On 05/15/2009 at 7:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML

#1127830
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55818) - you deserved it (3282)

On 04/19/2009 at 7:07pm - work - by guessimdead (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

#1091481
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61467) - you deserved it (13954)

On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking back to my home in the city in the dark. I'm paranoid, so when I saw movement behind me I clutched my mace. The faster I walked, the closer the person seemed to be. I spun around and sprayed my attacker with mace. It was my shadow and the wind blew the mace back into eyes. FML

#1026397
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27794) - you deserved it (81686)

On 04/16/2009 at 5:27pm - misc - by Eyesore - United States (Georgia)

Today, I walked past a church with a bunch of people standing outside waiting for the bride and groom to walk out. When the church doors opened, I yelled congratulations as loud as I could. It was a funeral. FML

#811533
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19937) - you deserved it (73837)

On 04/05/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by oops (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, driving some friends back from a party I said, "Did everyone see Lisa totally hanging off of Pat tonight?! It was hilarious!!". There was a long silence, then one of my friends said "...you know Lisa is in the car, right?" FML

#480695
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17163) - you deserved it (96899)

On 03/19/2009 at 11:41pm - misc - by StephD (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82587) - you deserved it (15092)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

#459087
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29507) - you deserved it (108044)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by JohnMackSquirts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77614) - you deserved it (28534)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

#434812
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45109) - you deserved it (24215)

On 03/18/2009 at 3:59am - misc - by elevator-troubles (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)



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