About PenguinBitch : Alderaan was the newest member of the United Federation of Planets. Unfortunately, the once stable black hole connecting Alderaan and the Federation, destabilized. The distress signal received from StarFleet was lost, leading to the destruction of Alderaan by the Galactic Empire.
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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs
by heya / 12/24/2012 at 5:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 10:02am / Australia / Kids
by Kate / 12/23/2012 at 3:24am / United States (Missouri) / Animals
Today, I looked at my neighbor's empty lawn; he's an old guy and he usually has the best Christmas lights. We knew he might not be able to do them this year, so I felt bad and I did them for him. Later, a neighbor asked about them and I told her that I helped out. She said, "You do know he died, right?" FML
by Syd / 12/21/2012 at 11:00am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML
by fatbabysyndrome / 12/18/2012 at 12:33pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by crazy mother in law / 12/17/2012 at 1:48pm / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm / Ireland (Waterford) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 3:08am / United States (California) / Kids
by Money-money-money / 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm / France / Money
Today, I went on a cruise. I gave my bags to a porter, and tipped him $5. Later that night, my bags still hadn't arrived at my room, and that's when I realized that I'd paid a fake porter to steal my bags. FML
by McFizzy321 / 12/12/2012 at 10:43pm / United States (Florida) / Holidays
by Karim / 12/12/2012 at 12:29am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to Christianity. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML
by Anonymous / 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by jitiizer / 09/19/2012 at 1:02pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Miscellaneous
by alix / 08/24/2012 at 11:45am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…