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PenguinBitch

Offline (the 07/03/2014 at 2:21am) | Search for a member

PenguinBitch

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6658
  • Number of comments : 855
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About PenguinBitch : Hello. Feel free to send me a message if y'all wanna talk or so. I like meeting new people. Other than that, happy fml'ing! :)

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>toasty_narwals</b> - 6 hours ago<b>auddey</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:08pm<b>Nakor28</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:03am<b>annie_potter_</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 11:15pm<b>jlang917</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 8:52pm<b>Docbee</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:53pm<b>savery</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:57pm<b>thatguy7878</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 7:45am<b>Hannahmgp</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 6:07am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:38am<b>GucciFrog</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Vitrolicz</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 7:20pm<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 6:06pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:40pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:31pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 1:27pm<b>RenoTheRhino</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:15am

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

#20451265
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28900) - you deserved it (5674)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

#20451178
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38943) - you deserved it (5367)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML

#20450136
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28510) - you deserved it (7142)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:57pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49260) - you deserved it (4753)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, at work, a little girl came in and asked if we had any dance clothes. As I showed her, I asked if she was in a competition. When she said yes, I crossed my fingers and told her I hoped she would win. Unfortunately, I didn't cross them properly and I accidentally gave her the finger. FML

Today, in an elaborate plan to finally meet my cute neighbor, I convinced my friendly mailman to switch up our mail so I'd have an excuse to meet her. After I delivered her mail, I waited for her to mention that she had my mail, but she never did. I even saw her take it out of her mail box. FML

#20446490
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10877) - you deserved it (32771)

On 01/07/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by james88 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I came home to a flooded apartment and water still pouring from the ceiling. The woman who lives above me is shocked that I would consider her responsible for the damage and doesn't think she should have to pay for it. FML

#20444637
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23195) - you deserved it (1479)

On 01/06/2013 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I bought myself a pair of beautiful, hand-crafted earrings with lighthouses on them. My mother was quick to point out the lighthouses look like dicks. I don't think I can ever wear them again. FML

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25569) - you deserved it (5181)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11150) - you deserved it (39876)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while buying paint, I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told me what a nice young lady I was. Then her boss came over, screamed at her for being lazy and fired her. She cried. So did I. FML

#20433852
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (2835)

On 12/31/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

#20431269
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44196) - you deserved it (3440)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:29am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

#20427495
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45595) - you deserved it (9516)

On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31052) - you deserved it (6307)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38519) - you deserved it (7950)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States



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