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PenguinBitch

Offline (the 07/12/2015 at 9:45am) | Search for a member

PenguinBitch

76Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14849
  • Number of comments : 1113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About PenguinBitch : Happy FML'ling.

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>SuumahEli</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:04pm<b>guss5441</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:17pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:08am<b>Insanemf18</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 10:01pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 8:46am<b>fire_flies</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 8:07am<b>IdntNOthePASS</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 7:26pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 7:57pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 2:17pm<b>EpicDudeX1</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:25pm<b>FailStaff</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 1:25pm<b>TheJasonLi</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 4:51am<b>worstgradesna</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:52pm<b>tylertexans</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:27pm<b>NotLemon</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 4:25pm<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:05pm<b>terspal</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:32am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 11:19am

Fucked!<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 10:08am<b>IdntNOthePASS</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 1:26am<b>kylalaffertyy</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 9:28pm<b>NotLemon</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 10:25pm<b>terspal</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:32pm<b>pollymo14</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 5:00pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 6:12am<b>carilica</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 1:56pm<b>Unbearable</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:16am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 7:29pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:21am<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 2:12am<b>RektRules</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 1:04am<b>sp00derman</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:41am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 12:31am<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:51pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 8:14pm

PenguinBitch's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

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How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50686) - you deserved it (21527)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#20724232
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55796) - you deserved it (6764)

On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

#20723415
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50253) - you deserved it (3355)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37722) - you deserved it (68520)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, at work, a customer came in and ordered a "Butterbeer Frappuccino." When I said we serve no such thing, she yelled at me for "lying" to her, saying she knew about our "secret menu." She ended up complaining to my manager and demanded that he fire me. FML

#20714023
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52938) - you deserved it (4007)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:20pm - work - by I hate my job (woman) - United States

Today, it was my high school graduation. Everything was going fine until everyone saw my family fighting over where we would go afterwards. Security had to pull them apart. FML

#20712915
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45202) - you deserved it (3112)

On 06/08/2013 at 1:12am - misc - by congrats grad - United States (California)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53700) - you deserved it (4069)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, a deaf customer came to my work. In an attempt to connect with him I introduced myself in sign language. He just rolled his eyes and pointed at my name tag. FML

#20707121
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46091) - you deserved it (12322)

On 06/05/2013 at 5:46am - work - by WOWBear - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me while screaming, "My precious!" FML

#20701776
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44901) - you deserved it (7213)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

#20698730
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63157) - you deserved it (3150)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by regstl - United States (Oregon)

Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML

#20698103
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50280) - you deserved it (5803)

On 05/31/2013 at 8:50pm - money - by speechless (man) - United Kingdom (Wirral)

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

#20697165
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31657) - you deserved it (34959)

On 05/31/2013 at 10:59am - animals - by fuckshitcockwaffle (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

#20692497
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55923) - you deserved it (5707)

On 05/29/2013 at 12:49am - money - by $$$ - Australia (New South Wales)



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