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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitch

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7052
  • Number of comments : 875
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About PenguinBitch : Movie fanatic
Clash of clans addict
Message me if y'all want to talk or so, I like meeting new people. Other than that, Happy Fml'ing!

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>kellyb1094</b> - yesterday at 10:26pm<b>laden_swallow09</b> - yesterday at 4:46pm<b>trex454</b> - yesterday at 3:19pm<b>zdane</b> - yesterday at 1:34pm<b>notabeachbabe</b> - yesterday at 12:30pm<b>jayeterror775</b> - yesterday at 11:27am<b>jack_jill05</b> - yesterday at 11:19am<b>olivetree172</b> - yesterday at 11:17am<b>Welshite</b> - yesterday at 11:10am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:16pm<b>windell</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:18pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:56pm<b>cohnsonj</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:20pm<b>MrDonSalvetti</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:59am<b>buckydargon</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 10:34pm<b>msunique_me</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 7:21pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:45pm<b>rylaii</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:06pm

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to make a poster for social studies. I decided to write "Nice ass" in hieroglyphics. Turns out my teacher can read hieroglyphics. FML

#20691781
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22580) - you deserved it (46858)

On 05/28/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by Amber - United States (California)

Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from the side, I felt something sniff my hand from underneath. I don't have any pets. FML

#20688489
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56624) - you deserved it (3892)

On 05/27/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by scared-straight - United States

Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML

#20683515
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56413) - you deserved it (17932)

On 05/24/2013 at 10:00am - love - by datgirl92 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

#20683274
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33713) - you deserved it (4134)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:04am - animals - by seriously - United States

Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML

#20680205
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35419) - you deserved it (3241)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45347) - you deserved it (4819)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

#20669389
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49629) - you deserved it (13502)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML

#20669248
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41673) - you deserved it (11843)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thanked him anyway and encouraged him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML

#20652174
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57251) - you deserved it (4560)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

#20644913
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45521) - you deserved it (6094)

On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60437) - you deserved it (9127)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

#20636996
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60681) - you deserved it (7092)

On 05/02/2013 at 2:27pm - love - by Jes_jes18 (woman) - United States

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

#20633236
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22951) - you deserved it (41654)

On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML

#20627067
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61114) - you deserved it (3242)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by wtfisgoingon (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I smoked weed with friends. Stoned, I put on my sister's high heels instead of my Vans and I walked to 7-11. FML

#20624531
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18963) - you deserved it (73257)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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