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Paulcs's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Paulcs's favorite FMLs
Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML
by Anonymus / 04/18/2015 at 3:01am / Sweden / Kids
by bigmouthedmommy / 04/13/2015 at 1:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML
by mademoiselle meurtre / 04/12/2015 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was called a fascist and accused of being "racist" against poor people, all because some crazy meth-mouthed bitch couldn't afford some booze and expected me to cut the price by almost 40% so she could. FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 11:18am / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I was asked to prom by the same guy who "accidentally" cut off a chunk of my hair in class and with whom I haven't had a conversation in my life. When I politely declined he said, "You'll regret this". FML
by scared4myhair / 04/11/2015 at 9:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
by jamisbetter / 04/11/2015 at 8:34am / United Kingdom / Health
by PrettySureItsReal / 04/09/2015 at 3:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I went driving for the first time with my mom. When she wasn't screaming, she gave great advice like, "Stop at the red light" and "Don't crash into cars". I need to drive 50 hours with her. FML
by fedupson / 04/09/2015 at 10:03am / United States (California) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 04/08/2015 at 1:19pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by NotALuckyGuy / 04/07/2015 at 12:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
by :O / 04/05/2015 at 6:19pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals
Today, the last thing I remember before getting the shit beaten out of me at the bar, was my dipshit brother saying to me, "Dude, I'm not a racist, but" and then ranting about how non-whites should get out of America. FML
by Anonymous / 04/03/2015 at 11:29pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML
by usadisvet / 04/02/2015 at 2:43am / United States (Tennessee) / Health
Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2015 at 12:39am / United States (Alabama) / Kids
Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML