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Paulcs's favorite FMLs
Today, I saw a photo on my mother-in-law's Facebook, proudly showing off the horrible job she'd done of painting her car. I sarcastically commented that I wouldn't inflict that on my worst enemy's ride. An hour later, she came by and emptied a bucket of paint over my windshield. FML
by time to lawyer up / 02/20/2014 at 4:20pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was doing a science presentation about glucose. There was around 20 judges at the event who could've judged me, but instead I got judged by the only person in the whole entire world who doesn't know what glucose is and doesn't think it exists. FML
by anonymous / 02/20/2014 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Twix88 / 02/19/2014 at 6:00am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2014 at 9:29pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/16/2014 at 12:22pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Work
by fuck my goddamn life / 02/15/2014 at 3:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a guy drove straight into an intersection, running a stop sign and narrowly missing my car. I had to swerve into a snow bank to avoid him. He stopped long enough to see that I had a toddler in my car, before flipping me off and driving away. FML
by Anonymous / 02/12/2014 at 1:11pm / United States / Transportation
by dumbwifehappylife / 02/11/2014 at 8:37pm / United States (Maryland) / Money
Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML
by Anonymous / 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm / United Kingdom / Work
Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML
by so scared / 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my professor that I'll be missing class next week due to upcoming surgery. I asked if I could take the exam that I'd otherwise miss another day. He said no, and that I'd just have to take a failing grade, then wished me luck with the surgery. FML
by ... / 02/07/2014 at 3:30pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I was at the library, working with some classmates on our major semester project. I accidentally killed power to the row of computers by me. I've never had so many enraged faces looking at me before. FML
by AnonymousQuagga / 02/06/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by LadyDeadpool88 / 02/04/2014 at 9:50am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
Today, I was singing in the shower but couldn't hit the higher notes. My wife complained and 2 minutes later she ran a tap causing my shower to go freezing. I shrieked. My wife said my pitch was still wrong. FML
by deargodthepain / 02/02/2014 at 11:53am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…