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Paulcs's favorite FMLs
by Torvaltz / 08/07/2016 at 4:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, despite my best efforts to keep my new apartment clean and weeks of denying the complex has a bug problem, I came face to face with a roach in my cupboard. I swear the little bastard waved at me. FML
by jettison17 / 07/28/2016 at 2:41am / United States (Arizona) / Animals
by for my brother in law / 07/27/2016 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by El Jeffe / 07/05/2016 at 1:54pm / United States (Utah) / Transportation
by pass me the fucking rope / 06/18/2016 at 9:17am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by can't wait to go home / 06/10/2016 at 3:18pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain) / Miscellaneous
Today, a customer at work was having hiccups, so I suggest that she should try to hold her breath for a while. Ten minutes later, she's talking to my manager about how I wanted her to "kill myself because of my severe medical condition". FML
by really / 06/05/2016 at 5:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, I fell off of the deck in my backyard, which wouldn't have been that bad if my drunk, idiot brother hadn't jumped off behind me yelling, "FINISH HIM!" while delivering a bone-crushing body slam. He is fine. I, however, am currently getting a cast for a broken arm. FML
by Daddy / 06/02/2016 at 4:04am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman kindly asked if she might take a photo of her son in our cowboy boots. Thinking it couldn't do much harm, I agreed. Ten minutes later there was a butt naked three year-old and his entire family taking pictures in my shoe store. My manager wasn't impressed. FML
by jasonvanr / 05/10/2016 at 4:19am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work
by jameen / 05/07/2016 at 7:48am / United Kingdom (West Berkshire) / Money
Today, I started a new job. The synopsis of my training was, "You're starting a job you're going to hate and you'll be fired for entertaining yourself while waiting for us to give you more work. But you're going to love being here." FML
by Anonymous / 04/26/2016 at 1:04am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work
Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML
by Jim / 04/19/2016 at 1:25pm / United States / Kids
Today, while walking down the street I thought it would be funny to moon a crowd of old people taking a photo, in a few seconds a couple of them started pointing in my direction... Turns out they were pointing at the car that ran me over shortly after. FML
by MasterMcrib / 04/17/2016 at 4:33pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/14/2016 at 1:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous