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Patcovoco

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Patcovoco

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  • Number of visits : 597
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Patcovoco's page activity

Visits<b>Mistress420xX</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 11:32pm

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Patcovoco's favorite FMLs

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

#21051355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42070) - you deserved it (21859)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, my mother-in-law called me every 2 hours, starting at 8pm and stopping at 10am the following morning. She says that since my wife and I are expecting our first child, I should "get used to waking up at all hours." She calls my work phone, which I'm not allowed to switch off. FML

Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML

#21035329
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51387) - you deserved it (10122)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by MM - United States (Maine)

Today, I replaced a usually fun collegue's picture of his kids with a picture of my face against glass, so it looked I was inside the screen. Everyone laughed, but he reported me because I tried to "erase his children" and "if anything happens to them" it's now my fault. FML

#20922441
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41075) - you deserved it (5051)

On 10/16/2013 at 4:22am - work - by Elcam (man) - Belgium

Today, I helped my buddy write a sweet love letter to his girlfriend. After reading it, she dumped him for being an "Edward Cullen wannabe", and when my girlfriend found out, she dumped me for "cheating" on her by writing the letter in the first place. FML

#20802821
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47327) - you deserved it (5517)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by ........................... (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57222) - you deserved it (6782)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML

#20778979
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63653) - you deserved it (4752)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:22am - love - by Stacy (woman) - United States

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30833) - you deserved it (65643)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML

#20688020
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60208) - you deserved it (4082)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

#20684326
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40905) - you deserved it (6324)

On 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm - love - by yesguysgetabusedtoo (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56040) - you deserved it (4369)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thanked him anyway and encouraged him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML

#20652174
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58195) - you deserved it (4634)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, my fiancée broke off our engagement. For some bizarre reason, she'd hidden a pair of expensive boots and her iPad underneath our ride-on mower. I turned the mower on and destroyed both without realizing it. According to her, the fault is all mine. FML

#20630400
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51786) - you deserved it (3541)

On 04/29/2013 at 2:07pm - love - by Wow. Really? - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML

#20617597
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49320) - you deserved it (3265)

On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - work - by anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML

#20613403
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58913) - you deserved it (7881)

On 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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