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Paria12

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Paria12
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  • Number of visits : 428
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Paria12's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He slowly turned to face me, raised an eyebrow, and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17060) - you deserved it (46027)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I was on the toilet, when I noticed I could see my daughter dancing in the other room in the mirror, so I took a picture with my phone. After I uploaded it, people pointed out that I was visible in the picture, sitting on the toilet and smiling. FML

#20566415
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11522) - you deserved it (42939)

On 03/30/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by crunknasty - United States (California)

Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML

#20559804
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35685) - you deserved it (1620)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26061) - you deserved it (5128)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

#20553373
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39585) - you deserved it (4435)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks posted a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commented congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who died 3 years ago. FML

#20553352
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43053) - you deserved it (9811)

On 03/21/2013 at 5:42am - kids - by seamonkeys - United States

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML

#20552676
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24846) - you deserved it (19986)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:53pm - animals - by SolaceInRage (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

#20550321
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26671) - you deserved it (1912)

On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after six months of writing a 40 page paper criticizing a famous method, I found out the professor who conceived it has transferred to my favorite college to head the department I'm applying to study in. They require I submit the paper with my application. FML

#20548512
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27307) - you deserved it (4013)

On 03/17/2013 at 11:09pm - work - by GeoKid (man) - Canada

Today, my fiancée and I showed my mother-in-law a picture of the location at which we'll be holding our wedding reception. It's a beautiful waterfront building overlooking the ocean. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Looks like a good place to commit suicide." FML

#20543312
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28443) - you deserved it (2090)

On 03/14/2013 at 10:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25812) - you deserved it (42948) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I were on my bed when things started getting hot and it began to shake. My little sister called the entire family to the hall to listen to "the frogs in the wall". FML

#20537793
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14366) - you deserved it (31106)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:41am - intimacy - by lolk - United States (Arkansas)

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31251) - you deserved it (1862)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML

#20535997
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28398) - you deserved it (4448)

On 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm - love - by Kiki (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

#20532616
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35262) - you deserved it (3396)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm - kids - by cjw - United States



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