Pandalino101

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Pandalino101

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1357
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Pandalino101 : Cheese is my life. I have this girlfriend and I love her so much cause she's beautiful and perfect and we're gonna be together forever :)

Pandalino101's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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Pandalino101's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 3 months got mad at me because I thought she was attractive. She has an identical twin, and she says if I think she's attractive, I must want her twin too. FML

by jack / 10/08/2012 at 2:36pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I made love for the first time. Before we left his house so he could walk me home, I fixed my hair by the hall mirror and joked about having serious sex hair. My boyfriend quickly reminded me that his incredibly religious mother was in the next room. FML

by blabbermouth / 10/08/2012 at 1:26pm / South Africa (Eastern Cape) / Intimacy

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he said that I should go to the bathroom so we don't end up pregnant. When I asked why, he said that I need to "pee out the semen." I explained to him 5 times that I don't pee out of my vagina. He still doesn't get it. FML

by bucollegegirl / 10/08/2012 at 10:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML

by embarrassed / 10/08/2012 at 5:12am / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML

by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I surprised my boyfriend with a bag containing condoms and sexy lingerie. He looks into it and says, "I hope you kept the receipt." FML

by juliette / 10/08/2012 at 1:39am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2012 at 1:31am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML

by Unfortunate / 10/07/2012 at 8:24pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was telling my co-workers about how I'd gotten tickets to a concert in a few days. My boss overheard. Later, he told me I now have to work on the night of the concert. However, he was kind enough to offer to buy the tickets off me for half of what I'd paid for them. FML

by working_as_usual / 10/07/2012 at 8:09pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my right ear drum ruptured. My family doesn't understand that I only lost hearing in one ear and continues to talk about me behind my back, thinking I can't hear them. FML

by lbelle / 10/07/2012 at 7:39pm / Canada (Quebec) / Health

Today, on our first holiday together, my boyfriend decided to spend his time reminiscing about having come here once with his ex. He then decided to go type up an email to her about it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 1:46pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my wife knows tattoos are a huge turnoff for me. She decided the best way to change my mind about them would be to get one. Across her neck. Of our dog's name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 2:43am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 1:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 8:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML

by bruisedego31 / 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy