Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

PandaKitteh

Search for a member

PandaKitteh

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2153
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About PandaKitteh : Hey, I'm Panda ^-^
I love music. Of Montreal, Joy Division(RIP Ian Curtis), The Smiths/Morrissey, Beastie Boys(RIP MCA), The Sounds, The Postal Service, Queen, the YeahYeahYeahs, Siouxsie and the Banshees, The Beatles, White Stripes, Arcade Fire, Bowie, and too many more.
I also love old school movies, haha :3
I'm a grammar nazi in training, I hate when people use incorrect grammar and when they spell things wrong >_> but I'm not the smartest person ever, so if I make a mistake please correct me :]
Au revoir! :D

PandaKitteh's page activity

Visits<b>straightpride</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 12:27am<b>Fancyman123</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:11am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:40pm<b>bdecker109</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 12:14pm<b>Orl_Original</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:24am<b>Nicky816</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:20am<b>Noah197099</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 5:25pm<b>DMAN80182001</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 1:10am<b>gabix3</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 11:15am<b>desidog</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 9:07am<b>wombatoftheyear</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 5:41pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 12:01pm<b>josh2014</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 11:39pm<b>elibel</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 12:36am<b>andrew1012</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 7:53pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 3:46pm<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 11:16pm<b>Nickb55</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 9:49am

PandaKitteh's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of PandaKitteh's badges

PandaKitteh's favorite FMLs

Today, my 27 year old boyfriend chose playing with Lego over making sweet love to me. FML

#19363269
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (10319)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my fiancé I wanted to hear something romantic. He said, "My dick loves your mouth." I guess that's as good as it's going to get. FML

#19231360
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25872) - you deserved it (6106)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Sharibabi65 (woman) - United States

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42112) - you deserved it (9138)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17269) - you deserved it (21795)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML

#18778131
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33218) - you deserved it (4118)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42164) - you deserved it (8107)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend and I gave each other early Christmas gifts. I gave him a basketball signed by his favorite player, which took me forever to find. He got me diet pills. FML

#18568440
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36803) - you deserved it (4302)

On 12/21/2011 at 6:28am - love - by tarynfaye (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48219) - you deserved it (3617)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

#18424133
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37223) - you deserved it (5107)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33380) - you deserved it (5418)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what we were thankful for. My girlfriend said she was thankful for her vibrator, because I can't please her like it can. My family thought this was funny. FML

#18346597
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38057) - you deserved it (8446)

On 11/25/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by notgoodenough - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML

#18334603
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45035) - you deserved it (7017)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

#18320267
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30171) - you deserved it (5250)

On 11/22/2011 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by Gabriela -

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35880) - you deserved it (18851)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43666) - you deserved it (7925)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: