OysterPearls

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OysterPearls

134Fucked!

OysterPearlsOysterPearls
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 April 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2917
  • Number of comments : 294
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About OysterPearls : Hi, I'm Pearl and I love you.

I'm Looney for Looney ❤



OysterPearls's page activity

Visits<b>Kethrin</b> - yesterday at 3:03am<b>Itineranthuman</b> - yesterday at 11:28pm<b>Starfall101</b> - yesterday at 2:38pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 10:37am<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 5:33am<b>meatloaf11</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 10:32pm<b>jttkkyt</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 10:03pm<b>DatBlueDerp</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 4:06pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 2:50pm<b>girlz123</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 11:43am<b>missblue97</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:28am<b>PrinceMO</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:01am<b>brandonc8892</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 2:20am<b>uzo_od</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 2:00am<b>doctor__who</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 1:34am<b>drayloon</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 11:39pm<b>utrax</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:18pm<b>guskta</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 1:21am

Fucked!<b>spockadelic</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 2:14am<b>Mons</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 4:53am<b>alexishbu</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 4:09pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:54pm<b>UnidentifiedFun</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 7:19am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 9:07pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 4:06am<b>uncle_ssaamm</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 5:59am<b>fatman1970</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:58pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:04am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 4:01am<b>violetsweety</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 7:57pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 7:00am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 8:22pm<b>eliiteXXXninja</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 7:18pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:46pm<b>max367</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 6:58am

OysterPearls's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of OysterPearls's badges

OysterPearls's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to make the switch from pads to tampons. My boyfriend ended up having to show me how to apply them. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2016 at 11:15am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing basketball in the searing heat with my friends. I jokingly told my friend that I was gonna die if I stayed out there much longer. Two minutes later, I got the ball and made the shot that won. Too bad I didn't see it, since I collapsed right as I took the shot and blacked out. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2016 at 12:07am / United States (South Carolina) / Health

Today, I confronted my husband about a pair of panties I found in his office. They're his. He put them on to show me that they fit. FML

by Xandriajoy10 / 01/30/2016 at 10:44pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

by looking4newvenue / 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2015 at 12:56pm / United States / Health

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2015 at 2:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man approached me and told me he wanted to drink my dirty bath water. FML

by sam882 / 02/23/2015 at 1:49am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML

by vaylosa / 02/22/2015 at 3:36pm / Work

Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML

by HaliMali / 02/22/2015 at 1:21pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I had a dream where I whacked my head against my shelf. I woke up immediately after, freaked out and whacked my head against my shelf. FML

by IngenuityAbsent / 02/22/2015 at 8:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML

by awkward.. / 02/22/2015 at 12:15am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

by wife / 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's 1 year old. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2015 at 9:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

by poncho55 / 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I got the most tear-jerking comment so far about my severe stutter. While I was talking to my neighbor, his little brother interrupted and asked me if I was possessed by a demon. FML

by bradix1186 / 02/21/2015 at 1:00pm / Philippines (North Cotabato) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.