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Ouroboros

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Ouroboros

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5418
  • Number of comments : 194
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Ouroboros's page activity

Visits<b>katie55220</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:46am<b>idonotknow7</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 12:18am<b>Nusa1</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 4:02am<b>tetsuhiko</b> - the 04/23/2010 at 12:38am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 04/07/2010 at 10:10am<b>wienerwagon</b> - the 03/29/2010 at 7:59pm<b>Memoohhh</b> - the 03/29/2010 at 4:02am<b>GinandJenkem</b> - the 03/27/2010 at 8:33pm<b>ZeroMachine</b> - the 03/27/2010 at 6:54pm<b>Sindyy</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 5:12am<b>angrynegro7</b> - the 03/18/2010 at 12:12am<b>wingedspiritus</b> - the 02/18/2010 at 6:59pm

Ouroboros's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Ouroboros's favorite FMLs

Today, my roommates thought I wasn't home and started talking about me. Apparently I'm a lesbian, devil worshiper, and an alcoholic. I didn't know my life was so fascinating. FML

#17964342
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (2818)

On 10/11/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by FroggyGirl888 - United States

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML

#17894609
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25870) - you deserved it (5167)

On 10/03/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by Mike Polk - United States

Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML

#16895004
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29721) - you deserved it (3758)

On 06/28/2011 at 8:35am - animals - by hadtocleanthemess (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 15 year old brother, visiting me for the weekend, thought it would be a great idea to switch my expensive moisturiser for fake tan cream. I'm going to work in 12 hours. I'm fluorescent orange. FML

#16872149
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29596) - you deserved it (4593)

On 06/26/2011 at 10:15pm - kids - by WalkingTalkingCarrot (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

#16871149
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23074) - you deserved it (35812)

On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38752) - you deserved it (15596)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to a party and we all decided to play hide-and-go-seek despite our ages. I started counting. When I was done, I started searching and after 5 minutes of searching, I found that everyone left me. FML

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17446) - you deserved it (61241)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

#16830910
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35333) - you deserved it (9738)

On 06/24/2011 at 6:45am - intimacy - by Eve (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I was complimented on how big my penis was. I was complimented by the guy peeing next to me in the men's restroom at McDonald's. FML

#16794914
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46329) - you deserved it (7184)

On 06/22/2011 at 4:13am - intimacy - by fmlguy382 - United States

Today, I got in my sister's car outside the movie theater and started talking about the movie. When I realized she wasn't saying anything, I looked up to see my ex-boyfriend sitting in the drivers seat. I got in the wrong car. FML

#16722339
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28064) - you deserved it (14328)

On 06/18/2011 at 12:45am - misc - by sucks4me - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML

#16689352
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44721) - you deserved it (6005)

On 06/16/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by mike oxsmall - United States

Today, my friend told me that her favourite aunt died last night of a heart attack. The first thing I could think of to say was, "Oh no, is she okay?" FML

#15935216
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15082) - you deserved it (35756)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:11pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML

#15317811
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30675) - you deserved it (11841)

On 03/15/2011 at 1:58am - misc - by Megara (woman) - United States (Kansas)



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