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Otium

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Otium
  • Town/Country : Sweden
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17311
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Otium : Stuff about me goes here.

Otium's last visitors

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Otium's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Otium's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9679) - you deserved it (41819)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my daughter what time it was. She stared at the clock for several seconds before muttering, "I don't know". She's 14 years old and on the honour roll, and yet she can't tell the time on an analogue clock. FML

#16939621
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24662) - you deserved it (10690)

On 07/01/2011 at 7:12pm - kids - by sadmother (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28766) - you deserved it (3286)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after weeks, I've finally reached my goal and lost 10 lbs. My sister got jealous about me losing weight, and told my parents and coworkers that I'm anorexic. Hello, intervention. FML

#16931515
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31609) - you deserved it (2559)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:56am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dad forgot me at cross country practice. When he got there two hours late, instead of apologizing, he said, "Hey, that's only the third time I've forgotten you at practice. You should be congratulating me." FML

#16927788
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21996) - you deserved it (1748)

On 06/30/2011 at 9:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad forgot me at cross country practice. When he got there two hours late, instead of apologizing, he said, "Hey, that's only the third time I've forgotten you at practice. You should be congratulating me." FML

#16927788
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21996) - you deserved it (1748)

On 06/30/2011 at 9:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML

#16921062
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29949) - you deserved it (3536)

On 06/30/2011 at 10:36am - misc - by sealpop09 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

#16918734
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46400) - you deserved it (4382)

On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59495) - you deserved it (6231)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend. We'd just got our food when my dad walks in, comes up to our table and says, "I didn't say you could leave, you're too young to be dating him", then drags me out of the restaurant. We are both 15, and it was my first date. FML

#16903308
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38281) - you deserved it (11582)

On 06/28/2011 at 8:51pm - misc - by Fresca11 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML

#16897554
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35083) - you deserved it (7453)

On 06/28/2011 at 1:03pm - love - by lamortdeshommes - United States

Today, after checking in and waiting 3 hours to see the doctor, the receptionist said she forgot about me because she didn't see me. She asked me to come back tomorrow. I was sitting right in front of her. FML

#16896966
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27451) - you deserved it (3363)

On 06/28/2011 at 12:14pm - health - by misty - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my Dad sat me down and told me that I was adopted. I was unbelievably shocked by this revelation and asked him why he'd never told me this before. His response was, "I didn't know!" FML

#16895867
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38277) - you deserved it (2585)

On 06/28/2011 at 10:30am - misc - by adopteddd (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58182) - you deserved it (7220)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML

#16852326
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27736) - you deserved it (3576)

On 06/25/2011 at 4:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - Switzerland (Vaud)



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