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Otium

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Otium

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18779
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Otium : Stuff about me goes here.

Otium's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 12:06am<b>missalice0306</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 3:13am<b>pinklover24</b> - the 03/12/2011 at 4:40pm<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 06/14/2010 at 3:50pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 05/19/2010 at 1:11pm<b>ha</b> - the 11/14/2009 at 11:32am<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 11/05/2009 at 11:30am<b>mommy2be2010</b> - the 11/05/2009 at 10:29am<b>PhantomxBrave</b> - the 09/27/2009 at 11:15pm<b>CodeMonkey123</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 10:08pm<b>shallowgrave</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 7:32am<b>username666</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:26pm<b>griffmojo</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 4:36pm<b>5PoPpIn6DrOpPiN</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:55am<b>assman266</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 12:02am<b>Enrunwen</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 5:40pm<b>dizy</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 3:28am<b>Hydralore</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 8:08pm

Otium's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Otium's favorite FMLs

Today, my roommates thought I wasn't home and started talking about me. Apparently I'm a lesbian, devil worshiper, and an alcoholic. I didn't know my life was so fascinating. FML

#17964342
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (2818)

On 10/11/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by FroggyGirl888 - United States

Today, after being admitted to the emergency room for severe abdominal pain, my boyfriend shouted out in front of my parents, "At least she isn't pregnant!" FML

#17959837
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24107) - you deserved it (2903)

On 10/11/2011 at 1:43pm - health - by letmedienow - United States

Today, my mom yelled at me because I refused to lend her money. The reason I won't lend her money? The last time I did, she and my dad went out and bought a Macbook and a new car instead of paying bills. Apparently I'm being 'selfish' by keeping my own money and putting it towards university. FML

#17951348
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35696) - you deserved it (2203)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

#17950170
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28760) - you deserved it (2602)

On 10/10/2011 at 4:29am - health - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

#17948133
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45970) - you deserved it (3358)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm - love - by DyingPlants (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

#17938205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12178) - you deserved it (23681)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

#17920889
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38684) - you deserved it (6143)

On 10/06/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38770) - you deserved it (9996)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I came home from school and found my mother singing along to her latest investment, a compilation CD filled with heavy metal covers of ABBA classics. FML

Today, I learned that my mother might not live much longer. My boyfriend, instead of showing compassion asked me, "We're still having video chat sex, right?" FML

#17914334
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38624) - you deserved it (4101)

On 10/05/2011 at 8:55pm - intimacy - by Forever sad (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my friend decided to jump out of a moving car. I had to explain to the nice old lady who stopped that my friend who was convulsing on the ground wasn't on drugs, he's just really stupid. FML

#17903189
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24894) - you deserved it (2747)

On 10/04/2011 at 11:10am - misc - by dmanrique - United States (Texas)

Today, my 20 year old daughter started ranting to me about her latest boyfriend's erectile problems. Trying to be a good dad, I told her all I knew about how to get the boy fixed. My wife decided to stick her head in and say, "Listen to your dad, hun. He knows all about this kind of thing." FML

#17897207
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31627) - you deserved it (5036)

On 10/03/2011 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32746) - you deserved it (9208)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25660) - you deserved it (6087)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was training a new guy at work, my husband spent half the day creeping outside in his truck. FML

#17868574
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22233) - you deserved it (3027)

On 09/30/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Cristie - Canada (Ontario)



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