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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
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Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6508) - you deserved it (28935)
On 12/19/2009 at 11:07am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got a call from my girlfriend of 13 months. She told me that she had gotten chlamydia from the guy she cheated on me with, and that I most likely have it too. I gave her a diamond ring, she gave me chlamydia. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20441) - you deserved it (1653)
On 12/10/2009 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by Godi (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was standing in the gas station, pulling out my wallet to pay the $100 of gas I just filled my car with. I opened my wallet and found a note saying "borrowed money for food". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29958) - you deserved it (2861)
On 10/21/2009 at 6:05am - money - by Pissed (man) - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)
Today, my oldest son answered my phone call much to my surprise as we haven't spoken in a year. The first words out of his mouth were, "I didn't mean to pick up the phone." He then hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27071) - you deserved it (6405)
On 10/10/2009 at 8:30pm - kids - by Jer (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5053) - you deserved it (34531)
On 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by imok (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5053) - you deserved it (34531)
On 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by imok (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35047) - you deserved it (14540)
On 09/28/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by jentown11 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, the guy I have been in love with for years decided to tell me all about his women problems and how he can't find someone. After telling him I loved him he responds, "do you know if anyone else does?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36582) - you deserved it (3053)
On 09/12/2009 at 3:39am - love - by ksgirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35044) - you deserved it (2108)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35044) - you deserved it (2108)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47081) - you deserved it (3323)
On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12588) - you deserved it (32721)
On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6115) - you deserved it (72761)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24472) - you deserved it (65189)
On 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I gave my mother a pre-prepared deposit envelope with my fortnightly wage in it, in cash. I tell her exactly where the deposit box is and what to do. I'm now desperately calling the bank because my mother accidentely put my $1200 deposit in the little trash can for receipts under the ATM. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36793) - you deserved it (10711)
On 08/01/2009 at 10:08am - money - by outagrand (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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