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Omfgitsmia

Offline (the 03/14/2015 at 11:28pm) | Search for a member

Omfgitsmia

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  • Number of visits : 4569
  • Number of comments : 119
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Visits<b>XmasaX</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 10:08pm<b>mommy2cassidy</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:09am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 8:29pm<b>alixia84</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:39am<b>Cleu</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 11:54pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 11:46pm<b>flint37stone</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 12:31pm<b>n4ture</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 12:13pm<b>haocl</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:14am<b>ss521</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:01am<b>mandy_2480</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 1:15am<b>BubbleGrunge</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 12:37am<b>panther2013</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 6:14pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 11:09am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 7:05pm<b>pinklover1121</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 2:35pm<b>97mailo</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 3:08am<b>msmarles</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 2:16am

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Omfgitsmia's favorite FMLs

Today, mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with bare looool hands. When I askd her wat all the commotion was about, she said she was worrid that I would catch "one of those computer vruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
217 comments

Today, mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with bare looool hands. When I askd her wat all the commotion was about, she said she was worrid that I would catch "one of those computer vruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
217 comments

2day I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on mah knees and be your dog." FML

#18886717
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9301) - you deserved it (30772)

On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

2day I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on mah knees and be your dog." FML

#18886717
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9301) - you deserved it (30772)

On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

#18829619
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41224) - you deserved it (9752)

On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I playd Taboo with mah boyfriend and mah conservative family. It was mah boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I poppd your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

#18424133
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37431) - you deserved it (5116)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today... like every day since my brth... looool my name is Spreme. Yeah... you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too.

#18227248
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41200) - you deserved it (3194) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/12/2011 at 10:42am - misc - by Nico - France

Today, I dind and dashd. Upon reaching my car, I realizd I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9101) - you deserved it (112065)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

today mah girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She succeeded and slipped the used pad into her purse. I can't get rid of the memory and I don't think I can ever eat popcorn again. FML

#18120358
591 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60064) - you deserved it (4791)

On 10/31/2011 at 11:38am - intimacy - by ohdear (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today I want to mah husband's work to giva him lunch. His assistant told ma his "wifa" was in his offica. FML

#18108798
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46305) - you deserved it (2681)

On 10/30/2011 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today.. . I orderd food at McDonald's . I'm on crutches.. . and a guy offerd to carry mah tray to the table . He rushd out with mah food . FML

#18070361
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37292) - you deserved it (3201)

On 10/25/2011 at 4:17am - misc - by myownperson - United States (Colorado)

Today, mah eleven year old sister came in, and bitchd to me and mah boyfriend about how she was going to tell mah mom about the usd condom she found . My boyfriend punchd her in the face . FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52098) - you deserved it (16619)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today... for the first time... I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer... I was ecstatic. Later...hen I was in the shower... my brother snuck in the bathroom... yelled "Napalm strike!" an threw our cat over the shower curtain lyk a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45082) - you deserved it (5053)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, I Was On A Drive With My Uncle. We Saw A Dead Deer On The Side Of The Road An Expressd Our Pity For It. Then A Squrrel Runs Across The Road An My Uncle Swerves Toward The Squrrel, Laughing Hysterically An Yelling, ( Run Rodent Run. ) Big Fat FML

#17965176
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24879) - you deserved it (3756)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:14am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home from work to fine the front door wide open, the looool stove on, mah 5 year old cutting up the curtain, and mah 2 year old smereing chocolate sauce on the floor. My fiancé was nowhere to be found. Later on, I got a text from him saying that he'd gone to watch the footy. FML



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