OliverGothic

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Offline (the 03/13/2014 at 1:38am)

OliverGothic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 August 1935 (80 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1724
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About OliverGothic : Just a confused soul wandering this vast expanse of dust and rock that we call earth.

OliverGothic's page activity

Visits<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 10:19pm<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 11:01pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 12:53am<b>southernbelle_rn</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 11:07pm<b>DoubleDie7</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 11:51pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 2:49pm<b>FlamingColor</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 1:30am<b>oj101</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 3:24pm

OliverGothic's FML badges

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OliverGothic's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally ripped out my boyfriend's insulin pump while trying to give him a lapdance. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2014 at 10:36pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I asked the girl I like if she had her eye on anyone, subtly hinting that I wanted to date her. I sat there while she confessed her love for her cousin. FML

by Wowthanks / 05/04/2014 at 8:13pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

by Numbass123 / 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, after an entire year spent in physical therapy recovering from three knee surgeries, I finally returned to doing light agility exercises and running on a treadmill. When I told my therapist I had never been so happy and proud, he responded with, "This usually only takes 5 months, pussy." FML

by AnonymousAndSad / 04/24/2014 at 7:42pm / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2014 at 5:34am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

by Catuser / 03/05/2014 at 10:09pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at work, I was standing around, doing nothing. When my coworker pointed this out, I laughed and said, "It's okay, I'm training for a supervisor position!" Guess who was standing right behind me. FML

by sparkrok / 03/05/2014 at 7:36pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

by You Are My Sunshine / 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was shopping, when a man pointed at me and said to his friend, "Her. She's the one." He replied, "Yes, she'll do fine." I'm scared. FML

Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML

by coppervains / 02/22/2014 at 1:13pm / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

by awkward / 02/22/2014 at 12:39am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML

by lyss / 02/16/2014 at 5:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while in the prison I work at, I came down with severe digestion issues. Master control probably laughed as they watched me wait at the security gates in a cold sweat, squeezing my ass-cheeks together like an inmate smuggling contraband. FML

by TwistedCherub1 / 02/01/2014 at 5:42pm / United States / Work

Today, for our anniversary, I sang my boyfriend a heartfelt, self-written song. The first thing he said when I finished was "Your fly is open." FML

by zippersaremoreimportantthansentiments / 02/01/2014 at 3:11am / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I decided to dye my hair blue. The result is slightly different than I expected: my white bathroom is now blue, and so are my skin and nails. The only thing that isn't blue is my hair, which is now green. FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2014 at 10:42pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous