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Oihana's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Oihana's favorite FMLs
Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML
Today, my flatmate asked me to wash the large pile of dishes on the bench, and if I would start on cleaning the house which was a total mess. This would have been fine if I hadn't just walked in after being away for a week. FML
by I did them anyway / 07/20/2015 at 6:01pm / New Zealand / Miscellaneous
Today, I was talking to my friend, who was telling me he's having suicidal thoughts lately. He then said he'd be back in a few minutes. Nearly an hour passed. I panicked, thinking he'd offed himself. Several minutes after I called the emergency services, he messaged me, saying "K, back." FML
by Anonymous / 07/19/2015 at 2:49am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend's idiotic friend shoved me into a stream so I could be "reunited" with my family, since my name is River. The first thing I saw as I climbed out, soaking wet, was my boyfriend high-fiving his friend. FML
Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML
by Anonymous / 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love
by anon / 07/17/2015 at 3:04am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, I agreed to help out with my boyfriend's sister's baby shower. They forgot to inform me that "helping" meant splitting the cost of everything. I now owe his family $275. I don't know how to back out without looking cheap. FML
by JustOutofCollegeAndBroke / 07/16/2015 at 2:56am / United States (California) / Money
Today, I was having a dinner party. My guests were getting along really well. I mean, really well; it turns out they all went to the same high school. For the next five hours, I hosted a high school reunion for a school I didn't even go to, in my own home. FML
by trappedinmyownhome / 07/14/2015 at 10:11pm / Miscellaneous
by distracted / 07/13/2015 at 9:56am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, a customer at the restaurant where I work reduced me to tears by screaming at me, as I nearly knocked out his 2-year-old with the kitchen door, after he let the little boy play on the floor behind it. Apparently, it's my fault I can't see through solid wood. FML
by Anonymous / 07/12/2015 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Work
by Johnvris / 07/08/2015 at 10:44am / Aruba / Love
Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
by No-Sleep Nellie / 07/07/2015 at 9:26am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML
by Lesbihonest / 06/17/2015 at 9:31am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to go thrifting to save some money. Ironically, I ended up having to pay for an emergency trip to the hospital because somebody was too lazy to wash the cat hair off their clothes. I'm severely allergic to cats. FML
by alyssaamarante / 06/12/2015 at 10:41pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML
by kash / 06/01/2015 at 2:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 2Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…
- Today, my husband decided to sell my car, which is in excellent working condition. Why? He decided… Today, I was fired for calling in sick, I've never missed a day of work before this and I've never… Today, I bought a non-refundable $200 plane ticket to Ohio to be with my girlfriend who moved there…