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Oihana's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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Oihana's favorite FMLs
Today, while I was working replacing a windshield, some jerk off hit my truck. A truck carrying 2 grand in glass. Including the windshield I was about to install. The driver gets out and says, "Sorry man, I had to text my girlfriend." FML
by automotive glass tech / 01/21/2016 at 1:09pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Transportation
by Mr_Yato / 01/19/2016 at 3:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Brayden / 01/09/2016 at 10:27pm / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation
by whenlifeisalemon / 01/09/2016 at 6:19pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by retail can shart a cock / 01/09/2016 at 12:25am / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 12/31/2015 at 1:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Smiley / 12/31/2015 at 9:33am / Aruba / Miscellaneous
Today, I found the engagement ring I'd bought and been missing for a week. On my girlfriend's hand. While my childhood friend was inside her. They apparently like pretending she's married while doing this. They made this self-discovery a week ago. Good for them. I don't want the ring back. FML
by CogadhTallon / 12/29/2015 at 9:11pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, while babysitting a young girl, I put on the movie Bambi, as she told me it was her favorite movie. I didn't know that her parents always skipped the scene where Bambi's mom dies. Despite my attempts to comfort her, she was still upset when her parents returned. Her mom blamed me. FML
by Anonymous / 12/29/2015 at 7:58pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I got together a surprise party for my mom's birthday. I invited all her friends and her douchebag boyfriend who I don't get along with. When my mom got home, he took credit and got her friends to back him up with bribing. My mom said I'm selfish and horrible for not trying for her. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2015 at 7:00pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I tried dying my hair blonde. I put my hair in a bun and waited for it to dye. I guess I did something wrong, because my hair is now 4 different shades of blonde/orange, along with patches of my natural black hair. FML
by shitberries / 12/25/2015 at 11:00am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally realized the toll working as a cashier 5 days a week during the holidays does to your psyche. I just said "Welcome To Walgreens", out of pure reflex, to my cat as she walked into my kitchen. FML
by Deweyboy / 12/21/2015 at 1:01pm / United States / Work
Today, I had fallen asleep in the back of a friend's car on the way home from a night out. When I woke up, they were in the middle of a full-on make out session. I had to pretend to be asleep for 20 minutes until they decided to "wake me up". FML
by mikmak / 12/20/2015 at 8:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, I was giving my friend a crash course in Star Wars over coffee. As I was telling him about the primitive and savage Sand People, some attention-seeking tit came out of nowhere and called me racist. Apparently she thought I was talking about people from the Middle East. FML
by Anonymous / 12/18/2015 at 2:58pm / Australia (Victoria) / Geek
Today, my grandma was sent to the hospital so I called out of work. My bosses told me that if I didn't come in I would be fired. I did so, only to find out they needed me there so I could close the restaurant while they left early to go to a party. FML
by CLupo / 12/17/2015 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…