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Oihana's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Oihana's favorite FMLs
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
by bastards / 06/05/2014 at 4:05pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Kids
by damn it rose / 05/31/2014 at 9:40am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Love
Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML
by megangubler / 05/26/2014 at 6:34pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML
by notgoodwitholdpeople / 05/23/2014 at 12:00pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous
Today, I was on my way to my first job interview in months. I wasn't even halfway to the place when a bunch of cockbites in a car drove past and hurled a bucket of paint out the window, drenching me and several other people on the street. FML
by spasti-cunt / 05/17/2014 at 4:51pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous
by bambam / 05/12/2014 at 12:01pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML
by Gone With the Wind / 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
Today, my parents decided to get with the times. So far, they've made me get Snapchat and Instagram accounts, and made me add them on Facebook. They keep acting like annoying teenagers, and get mad at me when I don't play along. For the love of god, somebody save me. FML
by Anais Strongrump III Jr. / 05/09/2014 at 4:41pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my neighbor scolded me for "allowing" her son to be bitten by one of my dogs. This would be reasonable, except for the fact that her kid had jumped my fence and tried to steal a rattle out of my daughter's hands. FML
by Arthur / 05/07/2014 at 3:16pm / United States / Kids
by failureatlife / 04/27/2014 at 3:16pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
by snore / 04/19/2014 at 4:12pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Love
Today, after months of being on anti-depression medication and feeling very little emotionally, I finally felt some joy. Sadly it was from completely crushing my husband in an argument he started, where he claimed ketchup is a vegetable. FML
by Anonymous / 04/08/2014 at 12:07pm / Italy (Veneto) / Miscellaneous
by mookiemookie01 / 03/27/2014 at 6:34pm / Miscellaneous
by alicia75 / 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals
Today, I awoke to the sound of a gunshot, followed by children screaming. I leapt out of bed and ran to my balcony, only to see people casually milling around the elementary school parking lot under a "Science Fair" banner. A kid's science experiment scared me shitless. FML
by gracehi / 03/07/2014 at 3:29pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of…