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Octain

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Octain
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 577
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Octain : Love quad riding, muscle cars, video games, roller blading, drawing, animals, playing my instruments, drag racing (both watching and competing), and standing out from the crowd.

Musical Interests: Metal

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Octain's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

#20150778
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17895) - you deserved it (10765)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm - love - by new name (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I looked up the side effects of the antidepressants I've recently started taking. Inability to orgasm is one of them. I can either not be depressed, or I can have an orgasm. FML

#20148960
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20143) - you deserved it (2599)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by HappinessOrOrgasms (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while I was cleaning out my son's room, I came across his diary. Opening it out of curiosity, I found ramblings about how blacks, Jews, and other "inferior breeds" should be forcibly sterilized "for the common good." FML

#20147982
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19805) - you deserved it (6126)

On 11/04/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Ugh - United States (California)

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML

#20147226
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13592) - you deserved it (9926)

On 11/04/2012 at 12:12pm - animals - by spiderwoman (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turned on by the smell of bananas. Guess whose new co-worker peels a nice, fragrant banana five times a day. FML

#20139261
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20779) - you deserved it (2125)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16455) - you deserved it (1936)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, despite my pain, my mom still refuses to take me to a foot doctor because, "They all have foot fetishes." FML

#20132061
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14370) - you deserved it (780)

On 10/24/2012 at 10:44pm - health - by illjustlimpthen (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19905) - you deserved it (4039)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my husband decided that he simply couldn't exist any longer without giving me his own version of a wet-willy. He creeped up on me as I was sleeping and wiggled his wet penis around in my ear. FML

#20115322
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19686) - you deserved it (2347)

On 10/13/2012 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking home when I saw an elderly woman struggling with a large bag of garbage. I asked if I could help. I got it all the way to the dumpster and the bag ripped. Inside were about fourteen dead cats. FML

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21022) - you deserved it (4558)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

#20104739
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19596) - you deserved it (5065)

On 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm - kids - by TheVirginJenny - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

#20094500
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19731) - you deserved it (3399)

On 09/30/2012 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML

#20077962
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35397) - you deserved it (4574)

On 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm - health - by GMD (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

#20056354
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12457) - you deserved it (15229)

On 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Loserbot (man) - United States (Florida)



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