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Notimetobleed

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Notimetobleed
  • Town/Country : Bodø, Norway
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 May 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1351
  • Number of comments : 128
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Notimetobleed : Jeg ble født i Helsingfors. I mitt bilde er meg og mine 2 beste venner. Det er meg på høyre side, krisen i midten og to høyre Blaik flyttet vi med noen til Narvik, Norge da vi var 13. Vi er et band og nøyaktig den samme musikken. Det meste død, folk, Viking og Celtic metal

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Notimetobleed's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30635) - you deserved it (22433)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a highly intoxicated man came into my workplace and complained that the medicine that I'd prescribed for his dog almost choked him. I work at Blockbuster. FML

#17948173
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25706) - you deserved it (2075)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:30pm - work - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

#17948133
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43461) - you deserved it (3159)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm - love - by DyingPlants (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, a woman came into my work and yelled at me because no one told her the cake she had bought the week before was made of ice cream. She'd hidden it in the cupboard and it melted. I work in Dairy Queen. FML

#17940087
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28285) - you deserved it (2064)

On 10/09/2011 at 1:11am - work - by ab (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21309) - you deserved it (4680)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

#17938205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10584) - you deserved it (21793)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML

#17883500
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8980) - you deserved it (30603)

On 10/02/2011 at 12:53am - kids - by Kelly - United States (Florida)

Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML

#17813332
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25235) - you deserved it (3599)

On 09/23/2011 at 1:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I pulled one of my favorite hoodies out of my closet, and immediately noticed several large stains on it. Apparently, my dad had managed to open a hole in the roof and couldn't be bothered to patch it, so a squirrel got in and used my closet as a litter box. FML

#17778916
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18055) - you deserved it (1544)

On 09/19/2011 at 6:16am - animals - by gs - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to visit my family after a year at college. Expecting to impress them, I proudly informed them that I now speak fluent Swedish. Imagine my surprise when my mother said, "That's a useless language" and everyone agreed. FML

#17682906
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23569) - you deserved it (6231)

On 09/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jag talar (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (10875)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, I set up a mouse trap to kill the rodent plaguing my kitchen. While lying in bed, I heard an unmistakable snap, and ran to see what I'd caught. The mouse trap was missing. I now have a large, angry, and possibly dying animal running around my house. FML

#15275510
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24220) - you deserved it (6271)

On 03/11/2011 at 1:34pm - animals - by mike - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML

#14696721
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6087) - you deserved it (45678)

On 01/24/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by moxy -

Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML

#14208916
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34914) - you deserved it (3597)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

#14093813
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59083) - you deserved it (8363)

On 12/05/2010 at 8:38am - health - by newmother (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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