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NotSoHigh

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NotSoHigh

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  • Number of visits : 474
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Visits<b>HelenKeller1</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 10:06pm<b>sunshine1256</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 9:37am<b>ConBroChilll</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 2:45pm<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 2:48pm

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NotSoHigh's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51205) - you deserved it (7679)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was confiding in my dad over the phone, after I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. After I hung up and went online, I noticed he'd been live-blogging the whole call on Facebook and commenting that he was considering suicide to escape the boredom. FML

#21173916
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46820) - you deserved it (4459)

On 06/13/2014 at 11:56pm - misc - by -_- (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML

#21173596
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52872) - you deserved it (8942)

On 06/13/2014 at 6:53pm - animals - by sunil (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

#21173465
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41673) - you deserved it (5300)

On 06/13/2014 at 4:17pm - health - by green and not with envy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my psycho neighbor finished building a cannon. An honest-to-god, on-wheels, could-be-on-a-pirate-ship cannon. And now he's testing it in the forest by my house. I'm pretty scared for my life, to be honest. FML

#21171119
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40070) - you deserved it (4272)

On 06/11/2014 at 4:36pm - misc - by ldrik1 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while at my brother's funeral, my girlfriend decided to tell me she's been sleeping with him. FML

#21126504
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53916) - you deserved it (3335)

On 04/29/2014 at 6:40pm - love - by loserman - United States (Texas)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64951) - you deserved it (32511)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML

#21092620
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34082) - you deserved it (7091)

On 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm - misc - by richard (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41326) - you deserved it (12481)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after working 12 hours, my scooter broke down 2 miles from home. I had to walk myself and my scooter home all uphill. My boyfriend and his friends drove by, honked and kept going. FML

Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML

#21034458
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26455) - you deserved it (40773)

On 01/20/2014 at 10:34pm - kids - by Ginger_Gawd - United States (Florida)

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

#20894419
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50148) - you deserved it (4819)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Craigslist is Evil. - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58618) - you deserved it (10825)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#20724232
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52973) - you deserved it (6489)

On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)



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