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NotGabe

Offline (the 04/02/2014 at 8:20am) | Search for a member

NotGabe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1843
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 20 posted

About NotGabe : Checklist:

[x] Be a part of a Guinness Book of World Records record breaking charity walk.

NotGabe's page activity

Visits<b>christian1509</b> - yesterday at 3:17pm<b>99volleyball99</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:24am<b>annalily5</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:11pm<b>bdun4</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:56am<b>thestrangedude</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:37am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 5:09pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:07am<b>67_mustang_coupe</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:37pm<b>chiefsmalls</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:47pm<b>superwolf33</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 12:57pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 1:29pm<b>aloeatversailles</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:25am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:33pm<b>lunar999</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 7:53pm<b>Darkness121</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 5:03pm<b>kingdomgirl94</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 8:22pm<b>kent123654</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 4:06pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 3:31pm

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NotGabe's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

#20751029
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36250) - you deserved it (3385)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by smh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML

#20750694
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46115) - you deserved it (5733)

On 06/27/2013 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46150) - you deserved it (3887)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72813) - you deserved it (3148)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

#20579905
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30379) - you deserved it (6137)

On 04/07/2013 at 9:47pm - health - by poopy pants - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML

#20576240
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40515) - you deserved it (4067)

On 04/05/2013 at 2:51pm - health - by what if I'm being eaten from the inside out? oh my god (man) - Singapore

Today, I was approached by a What Not to Wear kind of show, where you get money to buy a new wardrobe. I was so excited that I fainted. They revoked the offer, reasoning that someone who faints so easily would be too much of a liability risk. FML

#20573162
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33593) - you deserved it (9811)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by SoClose (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71272) - you deserved it (6069)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38670) - you deserved it (2846)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, a small fly flew straight up into my nose. I spent 10 minutes trying to blow/scratch/pick it out to no avail. I can still feel it moving. FML

#20556028
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38498) - you deserved it (2649)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:17am - misc - by WTFLY (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML

#20554606
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49549) - you deserved it (6501)

On 03/22/2013 at 1:28am - love - by eww. (woman) - Australia

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

#20544356
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37261) - you deserved it (5467)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:44am - misc - by fmlman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21948) - you deserved it (34231)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML

#20460283
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18368) - you deserved it (34265)

On 01/15/2013 at 2:33am - animals - by I think its dead (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML

#20443608
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10183) - you deserved it (38230)

On 01/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by anonymous - United States



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