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Nosakare56

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Nosakare56

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 September 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 629
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Nosakare56's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Nosakare56's badges

Nosakare56's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
456 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43202) - you deserved it (4000)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

#21361029
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31921) - you deserved it (3791)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by bugger -

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32512) - you deserved it (3887)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30169) - you deserved it (9033)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28860) - you deserved it (8985)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, after a heavy make-out session, my boyfriend and I discovered his lips bruise really easily. This wouldn't be a problem except he's been telling people I hit him. He thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21349595
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34340) - you deserved it (3681)

On 02/04/2015 at 10:16am - intimacy - by Grrrreat (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I got back from a two-day trip for which I'd left my husband and kids at home. There's fresh vomit inside of my oven, and my 4 year old son has a mullet. FML

#21347579
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32106) - you deserved it (3682)

On 02/01/2015 at 12:50am - misc - by neverleavingagain (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34076) - you deserved it (3163)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43410) - you deserved it (27688)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35121) - you deserved it (3327)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43470) - you deserved it (7050)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML

#21114169
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39507) - you deserved it (6988)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:48pm - health - by Nose bleed - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30349) - you deserved it (16219)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, my dad took me to a bar for my first legal drink. He quickly got "drunk" and started slurring that I was an accident, saying the only reason I'm alive is because he'd been too poor to pay for an abortion. As I started crying, he burst out laughing and said soberly, "Just kidding, son." FML

#21092859
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45626) - you deserved it (5938)

On 03/21/2014 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia



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