Njlove0502

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Njlove0502

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 866
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Njlove0502 : I know my username is stupid... I made it when I was 8

Njlove0502's page activity

Visits<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 12:13am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:08pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 09/06/2011 at 6:57am<b>Pushka</b> - the 08/18/2011 at 5:47am<b>iluvboobies</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 9:34pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 02/17/2011 at 7:58pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:27am

Njlove0502's FML badges

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It’s in the can

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Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Njlove0502's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

by Username / 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2010 at 2:47am / Kids

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, bitch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Florida) / Geek

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

by youreajoker / 11/10/2010 at 5:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

by flying13 / 11/03/2010 at 3:27am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for halloween. He said "Single". FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 2:01am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML

by fuckmylife / 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, I found out I have a daughter. How did I find out? She added me on Facebook. FML

by Nick / 01/26/2010 at 4:26pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Kids

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

by gbhlaughingstock / 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

by bubbalicious / 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

by Pumpkin / 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2009 at 4:20am / Japan / Transportation

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

by poormom / 06/27/2009 at 12:05am / United States (Illinois) / Kids