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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Nissi

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Nissi
  • Town/Country : Sacramento, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 February 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 6909
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About Nissi : Ohai.

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Nissi's favorite FMLs

Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML

#17857162 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (28797) - you deserved it (1524)

On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108 (264)

I agree, your life sucks (24372) - you deserved it (3928) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745 (400)

I agree, your life sucks (7640) - you deserved it (52626) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204 (270)

I agree, your life sucks (28219) - you deserved it (3094)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

#16977432 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (22073) - you deserved it (4024)

On 07/04/2011 at 8:25pm - misc - by brittbrat4 - United States

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917 (211)

I agree, your life sucks (39998) - you deserved it (31190)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after staying up all night at my friend's house, I woke up to something I couldn't identify on my cheek, so I slapped it away. When I heard crying, I opened my eyes and realized it was my friend's three year old sister who was trying to be sweet by kissing me on the cheek. FML

#14577933 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (22207) - you deserved it (9720)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by ash (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

#14119130 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (23425) - you deserved it (1858)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, I was eating lunch at McDonald's when an older man sat down at the table next to me and told me I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I'm a 20 year old man. FML

#13715432 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (21946) - you deserved it (3834)

On 11/04/2010 at 3:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I'm training to be a nurse in a hospital. Our teacher asked for a volunteer to demonstrate how bed restraints work. After I was shackled to the bed she said, "Now let's make sure they work. Are you ticklish?" My entire class tickled me until I screamed, cried and nearly wet my pants. FML

#13699174 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (3349)

On 11/03/2010 at 8:08am - work - by nurse (woman) - Reserved

Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

#13697892 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (43524) - you deserved it (9217)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I moved back in with my parents in order to help them with the mortgage, so they don't lose the house that has been in our family for three generations. I also found out that I now have a curfew, and so does my husband and our 3 year old son. FML

#13685830 (216)

I agree, your life sucks (24919) - you deserved it (3185)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML

#13684047 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (25813) - you deserved it (8861)

On 11/02/2010 at 2:20am - work - by saraleerocha - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that my parents never ground me as a punishment because I don't get out enough for it to matter. FML

#13676187 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (17122) - you deserved it (3907)

On 11/01/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by evilparents (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I check my facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption: "This is what Taco Bell does." FML

#13588009 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (9291) - you deserved it (24910)

On 10/25/2010 at 8:32am - misc - by tanya - Canada (Ontario)