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About NinjaKeiLynn : My Names KeiLynn. I'm just a typical female. If it seems that I care about people who hate on other people please tell me. I'd hate to give them the wrong impression. I'm an all around kinda girl. I don't catagorize myself so I don't consider myself gothic or punkrock. I don't use makeup (I'm fine with the way I look and I don't like putting animal fat on my face just so people will like me.) I don't judge. And I live life to the fullest. I don't dwell on the unimportant things in life and I sure as hell don't hate on people. I'm just chill. I listen to various music. So. That's all.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, the guy that I'm in love with and plan to marry some day told me he would choose a million dollars over me. I got upset and told him I no longer want to be with him. In an excited voice he said, "Really? So are you serious I don't have to worry about this love stuff anymore?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21009) - you deserved it (5733)
On 01/30/2010 at 12:01am - love - by Star (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mother woke me up at 4:30 A.M. to tell me our dog was running down the street. I ran for an hour, chasing after her. Turns out it was our new neighbor's dog. Ours was in our basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17690) - you deserved it (2592)
On 01/17/2010 at 10:18am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67410) - you deserved it (9582)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my mother finally pressured me to wear my old helmet while riding my bike. Halfway through my ride, 3 spiders came crawling out of it and onto my face, causing me to lose control of the bike and crash head-first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32861) - you deserved it (5101)
On 08/31/2009 at 8:44am - animals - by phlyingphuck (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my "best friend" invited me to drink with her and a couple other friends. She told me to "just bring a few bucks for beer". When I got there, no one else had brought money, including her. They only invited me because I'm the only one with a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37123) - you deserved it (2787)
On 08/19/2009 at 4:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I went through my 15 year old daughter's internet history. On google she searched 'Excuses to get away from your dad' and 5 other variations of the same thing. We were supposed to be having a father daughter day tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40073) - you deserved it (11430)
On 08/16/2009 at 4:04pm - misc - by alealovespurple - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I sold a customer some beer. He then asked to see the manager, and told me he was a 19 year old undercover cop. My knee jerk reaction was to panic and curse aloud, before realizing he was balding, toothless, probably 50, certainly not a cop, and laughing at me for being such a gullible moron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9257) - you deserved it (35691)
On 08/02/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49485) - you deserved it (8024)
On 06/12/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by unicorn (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was running outside. On the last mile I am along side some fields. While running along the side of the road I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (9228)
On 05/22/2009 at 10:08am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69463) - you deserved it (32921)
On 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by a (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was at the mall blasting music, I was wearing a nice shirt and had my ipod in my breast pocket when I noticed a cute girl smiling at me so I smiled back and she started to walk over while turning down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21552) - you deserved it (49000)
On 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm - love - by zero_minded12 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML
I agree, your life sucks (51109) - you deserved it (6171)
On 05/19/2009 at 10:04am - kids - by nana (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping in the dog world meant dominance. Well, I decided to instill my dominance and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22838) - you deserved it (99482)
On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31025) - you deserved it (57212)
On 04/05/2009 at 9:48am - work - by 00Evan (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13297) - you deserved it (27830)
On 02/09/2009 at 8:50pm - misc - by Ab (woman) - United States (Maryland)
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