Nikki_ASW

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Nikki_ASW

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5645
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Nikki_ASW : Yuuup(:

Nikki_ASW's page activity

Visits<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 2:31am<b>xuankyogre</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 11:14pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:08pm<b>im_cb</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:02am<b>IceBerge</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:26pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:35am<b>JuliusSeizure</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 2:02am<b>danthehuman</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:28am<b>Anthonymm2</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 4:46am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:02pm<b>john_smth</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 12:08pm<b>Amanyyyyyy</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 6:34pm<b>nubbles10</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 11:32am<b>flametrafox</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 10:26pm<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:27pm<b>ThatFancyPenn</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 12:57am<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 12:33am<b>Sp4de</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 11:31am

Nikki_ASW's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Nikki_ASW's favorite FMLs

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2011 at 1:45am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, at work, I met a new client for the first time. Apparently he thought it would be a good idea to get drunk beforehand and spend the whole appointment telling me about his 9 inch "drill bit." I have to try and find this guy a job. FML

by grossedout / 09/08/2011 at 2:34am / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

by piece of shed / 08/31/2011 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was doing my jazz aerobics workout and accidentally kicked my 3 year old daughter in the face. Everyone we know, including my wife, thinks I beat her. FML

by Stan / 08/29/2011 at 5:19pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

by Andrew / 08/23/2011 at 10:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

by Username / 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm / United States / Love

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I got asked on a date. I was later told we had to cancel. Why? My ex is parked in front of his house and he is afraid to leave. FML

by nolove4me / 06/29/2011 at 4:41pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

by anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML

by Mom / 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

by Rachel / 06/10/2011 at 5:57am / United States (Alabama) / Kids