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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2778
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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NicoleS5000's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:06pm

NicoleS5000's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

NicoleS5000's favorite FMLs

Today, my blind friend bragged to a group of people that she knew all of us by smell. We all took turns standing in front of her, and she would tell us who we were. When I got in front of her, she thought I was my dog. FML

by Spec / 04/18/2009 at 2:09pm / United States (Alabama) / Animals

Today, my mom scooped the litter box right before I went to work. I brown bagged my lunch this morning. She brown bagged the poop from the litter box. Both were on the counter. Guess which one I brought to work? FML

by chriss / 04/14/2009 at 1:09pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

by Dang-ItsDanielle / 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

by Noname / 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML

by Ugh / 02/16/2009 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I really had to use the airplane lavatory. After I'd finished, the flight attendants continuously sprayed air freshener for two minutes. FML

by yerbuagalapagos wonder / 02/06/2009 at 4:50pm / Ecuador (Galapagos) / Transportation

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

by caroline / 02/06/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, while I was looking for a file on my boyfriend's hard drive, I came across photos of a half-naked woman wearing my clothes, but whose head wasn't really visible. When I demanded an explanation, I realised that it wasn't another girl - it was him. FML

by Lililaloose / 12/23/2008 at 11:11pm / Love