About NeverShoutDana : I'm Dana.
I love sleeping and crushing dreams.
About NeverShoutDana : I'm Dana.
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NeverShoutDana's favorite FMLs
Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
by W1D0 / 08/20/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by kaitylait / 08/18/2011 at 8:59pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Health
by bTOhno / 08/13/2011 at 2:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by TuteSweet / 08/12/2011 at 2:17am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by thatfatkid / 08/10/2011 at 1:48am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 08/10/2011 at 12:31am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids
by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money
by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I sent my romantic interest a sexy text about a dream I had about a "sex gameshow." I sent it by replying to the last text sent. I'm now responsible for traumatizing my 12 year old niece who could only reply, "Like Jeopardy?" FML
by PandaMantis / 06/25/2011 at 12:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Rachel / 06/10/2011 at 5:57am / United States (Alabama) / Kids
by stepsister / 06/10/2011 at 1:17am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML
by MakeMeASandwich / 06/10/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Work
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…
- Today, I happened to let my dogs outside and they wouldn't quit barking so, I checked to see what… Today, I finally finished the short story that is my last assignment of high school! I also found a… Today, I went on vacation with my family. It wasn't until I had gotten back home that I found out I…