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Neronine382

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Neronine382

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3307
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Neronine382 : There's a lot about me but I don't really find any of it interesting besides all of my past girlfriends have cheated, I'm tall, blue-silver eyes, and I love basketball and books. =]

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Neronine382's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

#16607799
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36254) - you deserved it (7128)

On 06/11/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by julia - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I updated my facebook status as "lost all contacts, need numbers". My mom commented saying "her phone didn't get reset, she just doesn't have any friends". Her comment got 32 likes. FML

#16216405
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44885) - you deserved it (7956)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Username -

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32131) - you deserved it (6498)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109057) - you deserved it (6557) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Today, on the train, a cute girl gave me her number. After maybe half an hour, she went to her seat and I went to the toilet for a quick but loud and painful dump. I opened the door and saw her outside getting bitch-slapped by the smell. FML

#15172476
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27104) - you deserved it (9123)

On 03/02/2011 at 3:16am - misc - by Noguestlist -

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13267) - you deserved it (47361)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML

#13972992
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32717) - you deserved it (3755)

On 11/25/2010 at 9:48am - animals - by Seline -

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54701) - you deserved it (2658)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, my best friend was doing my hair. She got frustrated and exclaimed, "It won't stay!" I replied with, "Just like your mom!" It was then that I remembered her mom had just left her dad and moved out of the house to be with someone else. FML

#13485741
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8134) - you deserved it (51536)

On 10/17/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Nobody - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

#7598826
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11648) - you deserved it (24959)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML

#6741801
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5265) - you deserved it (33980)

On 12/13/2009 at 8:27pm - misc - by MissSmarts (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a phone call from my boss' wife. She demanded to know how long we'd been sleeping together. When I denied her allegations, she screamed that she knew all about my "history of sleeping with married men". I'm a virgin and I have to work with him tomorrow. FML

#6335196
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (1750)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by bad_day_in_hell - United States (Montana)

Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML

#5925433
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37166) - you deserved it (6068)

On 10/21/2009 at 4:27am - misc - by sore (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I went down to my accommodation office in fiery wrath, demanding that something be done about my three-days-cold shower. Looking dubious, they sent someone back with me. As soon as we got there he looked at me with deep pity and pulled the cord in the corner that activated the hot water. FML

#5602388
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5866) - you deserved it (31887)

On 10/02/2009 at 10:20am - misc - by abrazama (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was getting changed in front of my room mate of two years. Feeling comfortable, I took off all my clothes and started putting new clothes on. I asked why she wasn't taking her eyes off my naked body. She said "I'm loving the view. Didn't you know I'm a lesbian?" FML

#5094881
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20003) - you deserved it (52845)

On 09/07/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by EyesOffMe (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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