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NeatNit

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NeatNit

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13957
  • Number of comments : 836
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>lizardFace</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 7:17am<b>ClaireQ123</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 12:30am<b>xleanne_aLly</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 5:42pm<b>ApexReaper</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 7:01am<b>fleckney26</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:24am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 8:09am<b>groovy579</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:43pm<b>raymanthegreat</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:01pm<b>Floortje</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:09am<b>alicat089</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 7:20pm<b>IMCH</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:06pm<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:59am<b>CRPSbloke</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 8:32pm<b>ruckfules85</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 8:34am<b>Laeffy</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:00pm<b>so_smooth</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 12:35pm<b>hannahruth</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 4:07am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 8:00pm

Liked!<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:00am<b>higuysilikepie</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 12:26pm

NeatNit's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

#966989
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51483) - you deserved it (18173)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37124) - you deserved it (90450)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to log in to my computer on a projector in front of business associates at my dad's architecture firm. I typed in my username and apparently didn't hit the tab key hard enough, so I typed my password in the username box. The entire firm now knows my password is "tits123". FML

#642642
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15162) - you deserved it (70634)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

#620821
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (126054) - you deserved it (9533)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my 11 year old brother walked in on me sitting on my boyfriend's ass and giving him a back massage. He tilted his head a little and then said "Aren't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't he supposed to be on top?" My boyfriend laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#560138
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97849) - you deserved it (30273)

On 03/23/2009 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by SLA (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82253) - you deserved it (15041)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML

#440568
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67948) - you deserved it (8117)

On 03/18/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Miller_Time (man) - United States

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

Today, I went to get my midterm essay grade thinking I couldn't have made lower than a B. Got to class and my douchebag professor gave me an F. He wrote "Best essay I read, would've been an A if it was the right topic." I wrote on the Industrial Revolution, instead of the Scientific Revolution. FML

#303227
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23118) - you deserved it (79246)

On 03/13/2009 at 2:08pm - misc - by Bamamomma01 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my cat got into the bathroom while I was changing my tampon. As I was throwing the applicator away, I felt a sharp pain around my vagina; I looked down to find him swatting at the tampon string. FML

Today, I was working at Old Navy. A girl came up to me and did a bizarre dance. Not knowing how to react, I imitated her to be friendly with the customer. Then she stopped cold. Her friend stormed up to me and yelled, "you jerk! Why are you mocking her? She has tourettes you know!" FML

#245096
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46794) - you deserved it (37636)

On 03/08/2009 at 8:00pm - work - by Ricky (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27697) - you deserved it (95895)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was walking through the mall with my boyfriend of a year and a half. There was sign outside of the jewelry store that said, "Engagement Rings-No interest for 12 months." I said, "Look, baby! No interest." He replied, "That's right...NO INTEREST." FML

#151605
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24001) - you deserved it (45504)

On 02/27/2009 at 10:18am - love - by Ma.Sa.La. (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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